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Life Coaching, Observations, Reflections, Things that make you go hmmmmm

Category Archives: Inspirations

Pride, My Ass

Pride, My Ass

It was “PRIDE” weekend in Toronto the weekend just passed, June 23, 24 and 25. Well it’s “PRIDE” month actually. We don’t want to offend some enough to frost you flake by not being all inclusive now do we!

The tone was different this year. The feel in the revelry and celebration that was there in the past, not this time.

There was a tension in the air brought on by PRIDE allying themselves with BLM and excluding Toronto Police. Toronto EMS and Fire backed their police brethren.

I haven’t read anything about the Toronto Parade as I write this. I don’t need to. I don’t need to read some racist or flaky excuse for blowing up a bridge instead of building one. I don’t need some arrogant flake or racist bigot telling me they are absolutely right and everyone else is absolutely wrong.

I don’t need to read anything for what I’ve got to say here.

The thing about not reading and not listening to anything either, as yet, I’m interested in what may have taken place or not at the “Al Quds” March. Checking my spelling, I see Calgary was peaceful so there’s a nice piece of news.

I already stated the feel within “Toronto The Good” was different this year and it was. I’m not the only one who felt it. Haven’t done much talking to others about that feeling and again, I don’t need to.

There were noticeably fewer people here for this year’s parade. I live in the core, lots of hotels and touristy things to do. There were fewer people. One of the lead Service Elves agrees that there were fewer people this year.

Toronto Pride Horse As I was walking up one of Toronto’s major streets in the core early yesterday evening I heard the clipity clop of horses and sure enough it’s Toronto Police coming up behind me.

All 3 officers were women. All 3 were flying the PRIDE Flag on their saddles.

As the Officers were passing a couple of people, something was said to them. I don’t know what it was that was said as the person that spoke to the Officers had their back to me.

As the Officers and their Chargers headed slowly down an out of the way side street in to the western sun, it occurred to me just how much the asses of the 3 horses reminded me of John Tory, Kathleen Wynne and Justin Trudeau.

Yes, yes I heard just fine what one of the Officers replied when spoken to, “It’s okay, we’ve got our own parade”.

G.R. Hambley ©
June 26, 2017

A Hair Piece

A Hair Piece

I had a grand plan. I came up with a work around regarding an emotional attachment. Then I discovered something so close to the culmination that I do know; complete the research before beginning enactment of your grand plan.

I’d planned, quietly, letting my hair grow to donate it. Three people were told of my plan as it was getting close to cutting the tail time for this tale. As far as anyone was concerned through the growing, I was just growing the pony tail because I really like it, which I do.

I’ve been doing this for a LONG time!

GRH Hair June 06 2017 - 03

I’ve written about walking the talking you do. I don’t know how many times I’ve said to people, “I do what I can” and I do.

I wrote another piece about me opting out on the pink in October campaign and why.

Another factor in my decision to grow out my hair for donation was familial. Some serious irony in this man’s passing.

The emotional attachment, I love my pony tail, I really do. The work around, let it grow for another couple months and then I’d still have enough to both donate and keep the tail going. A win/win situation.

The reason my pony tail won’t be accepted, I have more than 5% grey in my hair. You can read all about donating your hair for cancer here. The fact that the wig program is just for women (also news to me) and therefore not equal is to my mind, so unfair. I’m okay with the women only designation though.

I’m told by a woman that I related my tail tale of woe to, she’d thought of doing the same, donating her hair. The reasoning for not more than 5% grey I’m told is because grey hair cannot be dyed.

Been doing the managing of this mop that long too!

GRH Hair June 06 2017 - 02GRH Hair June 06 2017 - 01

I’ve related what I’ve encountered to ½ a dozen people now. Those people can’t understand why grey hair wouldn’t be wanted. Perhaps we should get the People at “Pantene Beautiful Lengths” in touch with the people at “Dove” and their campaign for real beauty.

My audience during one of my relatings, a woman and a man. We were talking a bit about the grey factor. I said that (there’s that damn modicum of decorum again) I’ve seen older women with the silver/grey look and they were smokin’. The man laughed at the older women comment and I told him I was looking for a frame of reference.

Had there not been a woman present and he’d laughed after what I’d said, my comment after reference would have been vastly different. Don’t ask!

Yes I’m emotionally present, a romance poet and still a guy!

Perhaps the grand plan of some other entity was for my plan to come apart so I’d write the tale and share it with the world.

I do what I can do. The donation of my hair was something I really wanted to do. It would be doing as I say in a number of ways, “Making my little piece of the world better”.

I make my little piece better, you make your little piece better, we got a better world. Simple stuff really.

G.R. Hambley ©
June 06, 2016

Curios

Curios

Curios

Curios

Mine is mine and to each their own
so whom are we to pass judgement

One’s choices predicated upon
by how you my dear individual perceive

Reapers, the purveyors of goods grim
honouring both dollar and ritual

But just because you can
does it mean you should indulge the macabre

Incendiary with a highly volatile fuse
fostering unspoken mortification

Done from love by loss
as inherently personal as love’s little death

Memories tactile, both taking away
and in embracing the pain

Open wide to holding up a mirror
reflection upon your hurting self

Morbid, magnificent, maudlin, majestic
what else could be said of selections such

Each and every with their unique curio
memory memorabilia a curious thing

Nature ‘tis of we mournful beasts
displaying in so many ways

Turning cheek, both other and off if you please
my crass, your cats ass

One tap, two tap, three, forever remains in me

G.R. Hambley ©
June 01, 2017

I made an error in formatting on the original post. The error is now corrected. The poetry has not changed.

A Marine Passes

A Marine Passes

At 1:58 am on 15 May, 2017 an American Marine passed on. To some that man was and will always be, more than a Marine.

Being a United States Marine didn’t define what the man was. Being a Marine was a part of what made up the whole man.

The man had a tough go before the irony that is the illness that eventually took his life got him. Irony in abundance. He fought the good fight with dignity and grace. Never gave up. I’m sure he thought of it as we all would in that situation. He carried on out of a love of life and family. The duty he believed was owed to himself and his family.

No one would have faulted him had he chose to move along to the next plain of his own volition. He endured that much. He cared that much to soldier on.

This man was given the last rites in Vietnam. He was subjected to derision at the very least for having gone to Vietnam when he returned home. He came home with issues and worked on those issues.

Much later on in life, he was stricken with cancer and the belief is that “Agent Orange” was the culprit. There’s your irony. It took his own country to do what the enemy couldn’t.

A number of years ago that man and I were out somewhere when I was down in Rhode Island working out some of my own issues. I do remember it was winter and damn cold.

We were walking up to the door after getting home and I asked him, “Knowing what you know, would you do it again”. This is one of those you had to be there moments. The man knew my question didn’t come out of anything but interest in how he felt and what he thought.

“Knowing what you know, would you do it again” and the reply was, “My country called”.

Not another word was spoken between us. We both knew and understood what was in the answer.

Three words made up a “you had to be there” moment. I cannot convey everything that was in those three words. You had to see the man when he said, “My country called”. I could tell you about it so you could see and understand. I can’t write what I saw that day because no amount of words is going to be able to describe that moment properly.

I spoke of that moment a couple times with people in conversation because it fit with what we were talking about. I never told anyone about this encounter that is close to the man. The conversation was between him and me and except for those few instances, that is where it stayed.

Toughest man I ever knew. One of the best men I’ve ever known too.

Semper Fi, definitely. Character, absolutely.

Francis “Frank” Connors is survived by my cousin Karen, son Eli, daughters Shannon, Sandra and Michelle. Grandchildren, more family, others who love him and by what is now, a grateful nation.

Gary Hambley, May 15, 2017

Supporting the Causes

Supporting the Causes

Yesterday was April 30th, the end of “Testicular Cancer Awareness Month”.

Also yesterday, I was asked to put an 8 Ball emoji on my FB page for “Prostrate Cancer Awareness”.

I told the individual that asked I wasn’t saying no but I’d have something to say on the subject.

I don’t like to override myself. I like to give my postings 3 or 4 days before putting up something new. Exceptions to the rule and rule carefully those exceptions. I got a personal beaut too.

Causes, we all have them and most people are of the mind that their cause is the cause everyone should get behind. If you aren’t on board with them then you’re some kind of something they can stick a label on.

In my travels through April I saw no mention of what April represented on the cancer frontline. I’m talking about usual moving around in the core of my city. No special deals with a percentage going to research for testicular cancer. I got my face in a knot over this lack of male consideration in a piece I wrote about opting out on pink in October.

I was enlightened by a member of my community that one of those major entities I note in the no pink for me has changed the way they do things. This would also be a lesson in being at the least personable, and even better outgoing within your community. You do meet some terrific people.

I don’t know how far reaching the cancer campaign for, “Lady Balls” was. For the uninitiated, Lady Balls are ovaries. That was the crux of the campaign, ladies got balls. Appealing to those feminists sans vagina and FemiNazis everywhere no doubt. Pissing off more than a few along the way with the approach too.

Someone close to me went to Ovarian cancer. I know what it’s about. I can even use the real words that represent the condition. I also happen to believe you shouldn’t be cute when it comes to health matters. That doesn’t mean you should be brutal either.

We in the 1st world are pushed at electronically on a daily basis. Push technology assaulting us when we the people want pull technology. No one likes being pushed.

Showing what cause(s) you’re behind is a good thing. Showing and telling people in your own space where they can learn more about or support the cause, also a good thing. Quietly asking someone for a hand for your cause as was the case with my being asked to post the 8 Ball, another good thing.

In the moment I have my own causes to consider and the things I need to do to be done.

Sorry man, the emoji is out, hope this will suffice.

8 Ball 01

G.R. Hambley May 1st, 2017

Spinsters – Lyric

Spinsters

Lyric

Spinsters Fini 01

What you’re seeing is the font I write in. I’ve never been enamoured  with the formatting options here at WP so on occasion, I work around the lack of options.

Spinsters

Stories making the rounds
none to be believed
none to be trusted
careful not to get busted

Those new age spinsters
dishing up their gospel
dishing up who’s in hospital
careful not to go to hell

Telling you what you should
dirt found on every track
dirt found in every attack
careful not to take it in the back

got yourself busted
took yourself to hell
won’t be coming back
Spinning hucksters wheel going round and round
Running freedom down in to the ground

Round and round…

Down in to the ground…

Going to take more than a frown…

Spew in streaming sensaround
feel that whole mind invasion
feel that total frustration
mold to fit the compilation

Spoon feeding the grand plan
using grins from ear to ear
using anything that will adhere
mold never stops injecting fear

Making the conscious beginning
listen to that self interested person
listen to that warning of treason
mold resolve to your reason

turn your dial to decompile
take hold of your fear
fill your head with reason
Spinning hucksters wheel going round and round
Running freedom down in to the ground

Round and round…

Down in to the ground…

Going to take more than a frown…

G.R. Hambley ©
April 22, 2017

It’s LSD!

It’s LSD!

(Lazy Sunny Day)

Made time, had to slow this mad mad world down
Easing down, easing in, floating the light fantastic
A little tail spin, a sparkling diamond daze
Nodding on out, letting the sun and sounds win
Down that lazy old river and you just drift away
Eiders fluttering down, settling in the rushes
Relative of Rocky washing his disbelieving bandit eyes
In to the last bend and wanna weep like the willow
Not going to think of anyone or anything again soon
Gonna be gone baby gone to replay this play day

G.R. Hambley ©
April 12, 2017

Pen Pals

Pen Pals

I was surprised this morning

Note 001

A gift from a friend

Note 001a

A damn fine pen that I shall cherish and use in my indomitable way

G.R. Hambley April 05, 2017

I Got Censored

I Got Censored

I couldn’t believe it when the censoring happened. In one of the last places you’d expect to find censorship taking place. It took place in a Scrabble game on POGO.com. For those that don’t know, POGO is a terrific games site run by EA, Electronic Arts.

While I was compiling this piece I had an encounter with Spotify a couple days ago that wasn’t censored.

The specific word is the “N” word. I’m not even real comfortable using that word here within the context I’m talking about. I was completely fine with trying to score points using that “N” word in a word game.

Scrabble; no proper names, no places, no swearing. I had a look at the “Hasbro” site as it’s their game. After a quick read I decided this serves as a better source for reading the “Scrabble Official Rules” than what Hasbro is showing.

I detest both censorship and revisionist history! We’ve all been taught that running in to a crowded theatre and screaming “FIRE” when there is no fire is not free speech and is dangerous and criminal. Nailing your ass to the wall should you wilfully endanger others, I’m good with that.

I wrote a Quoth me piece some time back entitled, “T + W + T = TNT”. It’s about writers and words and yes I qualify.

I spoke with some people about my encounter of censorship in a game. More about those conversations further along.

There will be visual aids and lets please remember we’re talking about words and censorship. After the fact, I tried and there were a couple other words I found I wasn’t able to play, “Rape” and “Slut”.

You can see the tiles in my rack and where I was going to make the word, “Nigger”. Now that I have that out of the way, I’ll go back to using the expression, “N word” because I’m more comfortable expressing with that term and because this isn’t about gratuitous use of a word.

I made the word, “ENGINE” below where I wanted to go.

pogo-censored-pointer

I am competitive. Any game I play, I play to win. I don’t care Thing 1 or Thing 2 about a participation ribbon! It’s about winning the game. Yes I play by the rules.

One of the people I spoke with about the word and censorship, a black woman. This is the same person I called a conservative during one of our conversations. She’ll even play Scrabble with me as long as there is no money on the line. That friend of mine contributed her thoughts to this piece when I asked and I thank her for it. I’ll get to it, further along.

There aren’t many people I know who’ll play that game or any word game with me. How many of y’all would take on someone from the PGA or LPGA straight up? That is Golf for those unaware. Guess again. Those players will beat you handily just using a 3 wood, a 7 iron, a wedge and a putter off any tees you like.

Any game, you want to get off to a good start. I showed my friend another screen capture. Told her this is what it’s about and with hardly any bother, 110 points. Yeah I kick the bots around too.

I made, “Vault”. The Bot makes, “URGE” and oh it was all over but the crying of the Bot’s oily tears right there!

110-points

This is where it starts getting real ugly. We are talking censorship. The decision to ban the “N word” ultimately comes down to one individual who signed off on the acceptable word list for Scrabble at Electronic Arts. Those two other words I noted, “Rape” and “Slut”, someone made those unacceptable for game play as well.

I’d of loved to have been in on that meeting. My commentary wouldn’t have been for the genteel or the Politically Correct Set when that decision got made.

Then along comes the gold nugget courtesy of Spotify who let that word go right on through and in fact provided it for me to look at.

I’ve accumulated a lengthy song list on Spotify. You can go see and use what I’ve put together just by looking me up at Spotify. There are no black outs in effect and there never will be.

Spotify creates, “Your Daily Mix”. These mixes are created from songs that are in your library and interspersed with songs the Spotify Bot sees as something you might like. At Spotify just like at POGO, someone had to program those Bots.

I like some of the stuff of, “Sly and the Family Stone”. Didn’t know their tune, “Don’t call me Nigger, Whitey” at all so thanks Spotify! I could of done without hearing it. I could of done without cuz it’s just not a good tune.

It certainly appears the good people at Spotify are just leaving the art alone and this is so good!

Spotrininicity

THE CONVERSATIONS

I talked to half a dozen people about the encounter I had with that “N” word to get their thoughts and feelings.

A Black Woman, a Caucasian Jew, a 1st Gen Canadian Film Maker, an Actor, a White Woman and of course, Good Friend.

Each and every one of us involved in this little adventure displayed some raw emotion. The question was asked on banning the word. Making the word “nigger” just disappear so no one can use it in any way, shape or form.

The Black Woman, she wondered about a couple other words that could be attached to a ban list and those two words are “Honky” and “Spic”. This same individual did a Google search and returned to me that the “N” word is listed as, “THE most offensive word in the English language”.

One of those people on initial response said the word should be banned. After discussion that position changed.

If you’d like a someone else’s perspective on words and language and how it isn’t the words that are evil, have a look at “George Carlin on Language”. If you haven’t heard George on language and words, you’re in for a treat or apoplexy.

The “N” word along with the battle flag of the Confederacy and the Nazi Swastika must never be eradicated. They are symbols and reminders of where we were and where we don’t ever want to go again.

Everybody in this little word circle agrees that what the word represents is atrocious. We all agree it shouldn’t be forgotten.

We also agree that if you’re so inclined to think racial slurs, we’d appreciate you just coming out and saying them so everyone around you can identify you for what you are by your own admissions.

I could get in to root origin of the word but in this argument, the origin of the word is irrelevant.

Me personally, no word offends me. The assholes behind those words and symbols, yeah they offend me plenty.

Words and History must be preserved. History and words are our lessons and our compass.

I’m going to close this out with a different word and that word is, “INSIDIOUS”.

It is conceivable as our digital age moves along that one person by changing a “0” to a “1” in a single line of code can make a word vanish as if it never existed.

Censorship is wrong.
Freedom of Speech is right.
I not only like this one by ATL, I love it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qV7T9escp20

G.R. Hambley ©
March 22, 2017

No More Yesterday’s – Lyric

No More Yesterday’s

(Lyric)

There were those who’d gone ahead
Learned the ropes and roads and dread
Some came and shared their mind
Others struggled and suffered and died
No one ever got out completely alive

Time hasn’t healed all our wounds
Easier now standing dressed and proud
Told the only way to win was not to play
Left choices to those we entrusted our fate
Now freedom calls us to shine another day

          Can’t go back cuz there’s no more yesterdays
          Won’t go back cuz there’s no more yesterdays
          Already lived your yesterdays

So few right and too many wrong plans
Time has come to make another stand
Not going to wear the dreams they drape
Can’t let them drain us to fill their grail
This trip around no one is going to escape

There’s a new train leaving the station
Going to be a change in world relation
Angry faces with voices of dispute
None wanting freedom will be left out
Finally freed from their absolutes

          Can’t go back cuz there’s no more yesterdays
          Won’t go back cuz there’s no more yesterdays
          Already lived your yesterdays

G.R. Hambley ©
January 17, 2017