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Life Coaching, Observations, Reflections, Things that make you go hmmmmm

Tag Archives: coping skills

Supporting the Causes

Supporting the Causes

Yesterday was April 30th, the end of “Testicular Cancer Awareness Month”.

Also yesterday, I was asked to put an 8 Ball emoji on my FB page for “Prostrate Cancer Awareness”.

I told the individual that asked I wasn’t saying no but I’d have something to say on the subject.

I don’t like to override myself. I like to give my postings 3 or 4 days before putting up something new. Exceptions to the rule and rule carefully those exceptions. I got a personal beaut too.

Causes, we all have them and most people are of the mind that their cause is the cause everyone should get behind. If you aren’t on board with them then you’re some kind of something they can stick a label on.

In my travels through April I saw no mention of what April represented on the cancer frontline. I’m talking about usual moving around in the core of my city. No special deals with a percentage going to research for testicular cancer. I got my face in a knot over this lack of male consideration in a piece I wrote about opting out on pink in October.

I was enlightened by a member of my community that one of those major entities I note in the no pink for me has changed the way they do things. This would also be a lesson in being at the least personable, and even better outgoing within your community. You do meet some terrific people.

I don’t know how far reaching the cancer campaign for, “Lady Balls” was. For the uninitiated, Lady Balls are ovaries. That was the crux of the campaign, ladies got balls. Appealing to those feminists sans vagina and FemiNazis everywhere no doubt. Pissing off more than a few along the way with the approach too.

Someone close to me went to Ovarian cancer. I know what it’s about. I can even use the real words that represent the condition. I also happen to believe you shouldn’t be cute when it comes to health matters. That doesn’t mean you should be brutal either.

We in the 1st world are pushed at electronically on a daily basis. Push technology assaulting us when we the people want pull technology. No one likes being pushed.

Showing what cause(s) you’re behind is a good thing. Showing and telling people in your own space where they can learn more about or support the cause, also a good thing. Quietly asking someone for a hand for your cause as was the case with my being asked to post the 8 Ball, another good thing.

In the moment I have my own causes to consider and the things I need to do to be done.

Sorry man, the emoji is out, hope this will suffice.

8 Ball 01

G.R. Hambley May 1st, 2017

I Got Censored

I Got Censored

I couldn’t believe it when the censoring happened. In one of the last places you’d expect to find censorship taking place. It took place in a Scrabble game on POGO.com. For those that don’t know, POGO is a terrific games site run by EA, Electronic Arts.

While I was compiling this piece I had an encounter with Spotify a couple days ago that wasn’t censored.

The specific word is the “N” word. I’m not even real comfortable using that word here within the context I’m talking about. I was completely fine with trying to score points using that “N” word in a word game.

Scrabble; no proper names, no places, no swearing. I had a look at the “Hasbro” site as it’s their game. After a quick read I decided this serves as a better source for reading the “Scrabble Official Rules” than what Hasbro is showing.

I detest both censorship and revisionist history! We’ve all been taught that running in to a crowded theatre and screaming “FIRE” when there is no fire is not free speech and is dangerous and criminal. Nailing your ass to the wall should you wilfully endanger others, I’m good with that.

I wrote a Quoth me piece some time back entitled, “T + W + T = TNT”. It’s about writers and words and yes I qualify.

I spoke with some people about my encounter of censorship in a game. More about those conversations further along.

There will be visual aids and lets please remember we’re talking about words and censorship. After the fact, I tried and there were a couple other words I found I wasn’t able to play, “Rape” and “Slut”.

You can see the tiles in my rack and where I was going to make the word, “Nigger”. Now that I have that out of the way, I’ll go back to using the expression, “N word” because I’m more comfortable expressing with that term and because this isn’t about gratuitous use of a word.

I made the word, “ENGINE” below where I wanted to go.

pogo-censored-pointer

I am competitive. Any game I play, I play to win. I don’t care Thing 1 or Thing 2 about a participation ribbon! It’s about winning the game. Yes I play by the rules.

One of the people I spoke with about the word and censorship, a black woman. This is the same person I called a conservative during one of our conversations. She’ll even play Scrabble with me as long as there is no money on the line. That friend of mine contributed her thoughts to this piece when I asked and I thank her for it. I’ll get to it, further along.

There aren’t many people I know who’ll play that game or any word game with me. How many of y’all would take on someone from the PGA or LPGA straight up? That is Golf for those unaware. Guess again. Those players will beat you handily just using a 3 wood, a 7 iron, a wedge and a putter off any tees you like.

Any game, you want to get off to a good start. I showed my friend another screen capture. Told her this is what it’s about and with hardly any bother, 110 points. Yeah I kick the bots around too.

I made, “Vault”. The Bot makes, “URGE” and oh it was all over but the crying of the Bot’s oily tears right there!

110-points

This is where it starts getting real ugly. We are talking censorship. The decision to ban the “N word” ultimately comes down to one individual who signed off on the acceptable word list for Scrabble at Electronic Arts. Those two other words I noted, “Rape” and “Slut”, someone made those unacceptable for game play as well.

I’d of loved to have been in on that meeting. My commentary wouldn’t have been for the genteel or the Politically Correct Set when that decision got made.

Then along comes the gold nugget courtesy of Spotify who let that word go right on through and in fact provided it for me to look at.

I’ve accumulated a lengthy song list on Spotify. You can go see and use what I’ve put together just by looking me up at Spotify. There are no black outs in effect and there never will be.

Spotify creates, “Your Daily Mix”. These mixes are created from songs that are in your library and interspersed with songs the Spotify Bot sees as something you might like. At Spotify just like at POGO, someone had to program those Bots.

I like some of the stuff of, “Sly and the Family Stone”. Didn’t know their tune, “Don’t call me Nigger, Whitey” at all so thanks Spotify! I could of done without hearing it. I could of done without cuz it’s just not a good tune.

It certainly appears the good people at Spotify are just leaving the art alone and this is so good!

Spotrininicity

THE CONVERSATIONS

I talked to half a dozen people about the encounter I had with that “N” word to get their thoughts and feelings.

A Black Woman, a Caucasian Jew, a 1st Gen Canadian Film Maker, an Actor, a White Woman and of course, Good Friend.

Each and every one of us involved in this little adventure displayed some raw emotion. The question was asked on banning the word. Making the word “nigger” just disappear so no one can use it in any way, shape or form.

The Black Woman, she wondered about a couple other words that could be attached to a ban list and those two words are “Honky” and “Spic”. This same individual did a Google search and returned to me that the “N” word is listed as, “THE most offensive word in the English language”.

One of those people on initial response said the word should be banned. After discussion that position changed.

If you’d like a someone else’s perspective on words and language and how it isn’t the words that are evil, have a look at “George Carlin on Language”. If you haven’t heard George on language and words, you’re in for a treat or apoplexy.

The “N” word along with the battle flag of the Confederacy and the Nazi Swastika must never be eradicated. They are symbols and reminders of where we were and where we don’t ever want to go again.

Everybody in this little word circle agrees that what the word represents is atrocious. We all agree it shouldn’t be forgotten.

We also agree that if you’re so inclined to think racial slurs, we’d appreciate you just coming out and saying them so everyone around you can identify you for what you are by your own admissions.

I could get in to root origin of the word but in this argument, the origin of the word is irrelevant.

Me personally, no word offends me. The assholes behind those words and symbols, yeah they offend me plenty.

Words and History must be preserved. History and words are our lessons and our compass.

I’m going to close this out with a different word and that word is, “INSIDIOUS”.

It is conceivable as our digital age moves along that one person by changing a “0” to a “1” in a single line of code can make a word vanish as if it never existed.

Censorship is wrong.
Freedom of Speech is right.
I not only like this one by ATL, I love it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qV7T9escp20

G.R. Hambley ©
March 22, 2017

Throw A Faggot On The Fire This New Year!

Throw A Faggot On The Fire This New Year!

The day of and or night and or maybe even the new year already depending where you are in the moment on this planet. To the other PPL (porifera planetary life) who may be looking to soak up knowledge, happy existence!

You can close your mouth now cuz I’m going to explain the title and a few other things as well.

On the morning of the 30th I heard a Gay man say to two other Gay men, “Enjoy your faggots”. Please make sure you processed what I wrote correctly. It was, “Your” and not, “You”.

I put one hand on hip, finger wagging the other and I gave the person who said it a couple, “Oh no you didn’t” lines. It was a perfect portrayal of the Black woman who gave me the, “Oh no you didn’t” a couple weeks back. I’ll get to it.

Me and that Gay man started talking about the word Faggot and I told him the first place I encountered that word. It was in a haunted castle ghost story. I was in grade 3 or 4 at the time. I’ll save you the trouble of looking it up. There are 2 definitions in my thesaurus for the use of “Faggot” as a noun; “a bundle of sticks and branches bound together” is one and the derogatory remark is the other. The hero in the story was talking to the ghost when the throwing faggots on the fire statement was made.

There was a time and I hadn’t heard it used for a very long time before today when cigarettes were referred to as faggots or fags.

We talked a little bit and I made my point emphatically that words are not bad. Words are wonderful and you know this, it’s what gets done with the words by people that make it ugly.

That Gay man went on tell me, the flaming hetero in this story about his reading “Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland” and trying to wrap his head around the frequent use of “Queer”. He went on to say he’d only ever known the word queer as how it is applied to Gay people before reading that book.

I bounce my stuff off one person as the piece is in process. I’m told by that person they also know the term, “Flaming Hetero” to be not homophobic, but hateful towards Gays. My use of the term is the same as my previous uses, fashion sensible.

I called that Black Woman the “C” word. I can’t believe she went all indignant on me! How many of you thought I’d say uppity? How many were hoping I’d use uppity as the descriptor? I even proved what I called her was correct by her own words, “Conservative”. The look on her face when I explained my reasoning for saying such a despicable, dastardly thing to her, a thing of beauty!

That black woman and I are friendly. We like each other. We are part of the same community. We see each other from time to time and always enjoy the shared company and conversation. We don’t always agree either.

We are both progressive and we are both conservative. Both of us can use all the words and appreciate the ability to use all the words. We know multiple meanings for some of the words too. In other words, we’re literate and literal.

If some of the head in phone sexting and gossiping set actually read and understood words, we’d all be better off. Right bae? Don’t look to me for spelling; I actually use the word “Babe” or “Baby” when that is what I mean. Terribly old school and insensitive I know, and yet, I just don’t care and use them anyway.

Just the thought of Dylan’s, “Baby Stop Crying” as “Bae Stop Cry”, phhh…..inish my thought. You’ll quite probably be correct even if it isn’t politically correct.

I do not tolerate the Liberal PC Set screwing with language. I will not tolerate that same Liberal holier than thou PC Set telling me about diversity and harmony. I live it, as the others in this community live it.

The community is eclectic and we like it that way. There is affluence and poverty and colour and same sex orientation and different positions on faith and we all get along quite nicely. No, we are not holding hands and singing Kumbaya as the homogenized all inclusive no diversity Liberal proles in the making set would like. We like it that way too because we also respect and appreciate that we are all different.

I can’t remember exactly where I saw it a couple weeks back but some Liberal (or moron) wanted to keep multilingualism with globalization. Why is it everyone but big “L” Liberals sees the problem with multilingualism in a global village? Those big “L” Liberals don’t see the problem because their stunted means of communication is all everyone needs and if you don’t believe it just ask them.

Words and communicating are one of those critical imperatives for everyone. How do I know this? Because like those of the RITE who think they’re right, I know because I’m never wrong.

Enjoy your New Year Eve, how ever you choose to spend it. May 2017 be kinder to us all than 2016 was and may your fire never be without faggots!

G.R. Hambley ©
December 31, 2016

December 21st 2016 Musings

December 21st 2016 Musings

Here it is Christmas again. Been a crap year according to most and I agree with the most.

Today we here in the northern hemisphere do have the 2nd best day of the year because after today the days start getting longer again! Won’t be long before we’ll be Patio Lanterning again! This is part of my coping skill set as an S.A.D., I know what it is, I know it will pass, ohmmmm.

You can see how happy and festive I am now that the days will be getting longer!

grh-a-2016-ho-007

I’m tired of the anger and animosity that has carried over from 2015’s election on Canada’s political front. “We The People” are pretty damn tired of the anger and animosity in their piece of the world as well. We The People will be carrying theirs on for the foreseeable future. Personally I expect it to end somewhere just around the corner from never. History people, history.

The loses in Music kept coming and coming and coming. A statement I made 2 or 3 weeks back is this; as a child of the back end of the 60’s the losses this year have been more difficult for those of us from that era. I also said it isn’t a competition. This is the life experience we have that 20 somethings don’t and companies want those 20 somethings to have.

The most painful and devastating loss for me was Keith Emerson and this is what I wrote in response to the anger and animosity of Emerson’s suicide.

I have things to be thankful and happy for too.

A couple surprises in my favourite coffee spot were quite nice. Dave Thomas came in one day. Yes folks Doug McKenzie himself came in. For my American friends, if you don’t know Dave Thomas, he played “Russell the Pharmacist” on “Grace Under Fire” as well. I looked at him to make sure what I was looking at was correct. He saw me look and watched. I smiled and nodded (like your work), he smiled back and nodded (thank you). This is what you call your average Canadian Celebrity encounter.

The 2nd one was a grand experience. An artist I’ve liked for a long time came in to the coffee spot, Liona Boyd. She became part of the conversation. Ms Boyd told something to me off of me telling her where I had seen her perform one time. She made it fun and personal and I really hope Gordon Lightfoot liked the song that was done for him. I gotta see that video! I was so enamored, as beautiful and elegant as ever Liona Boyd is!

I related the Boyd story to, “Good Friend”. I told her I don’t care if some people consider it sexist, “Liona Boyd, She’s a doll”. Good Friend agreed that it’s a compliment and from what I said, a perfect description. Hell, I’ll admit this too as I write, I’m still enamoured!

I’m going to leave this here with happy thoughts and happy memories.

To all of you whether it’s Christmas or the Seasonal change or just plain weekend, I wish you all the best in the next year and the years after that.

G.R. Hambley – December 21, 2016
All rights reserved

Not Caring Is Endearingly Canadian

Not Caring Is Endearingly Canadian

Why do you care? Why is it important to you that I must care about your cause or what you believe?

The worst thing you can do to a Canadian is make them care. We love not having to care. Cause Groups would be much better off asking people not to care.

You would be better served if I don’t care. It’s when you make me care that I have to say and or do something. You’d be better served asking me to continue to not care. I can usually do that quite nicely.

Why is it important to you that I care who you have sex with? Why is it important to you whom I have sex with? If you aren’t doing it with me, a child, or someone that you’ve tied up and are keeping as a pet against their will, knock yourself out. I don’t care!

In truth I do have a small issue with those of the Bisexual persuasion. There aren’t enough of the Asexual to cancel the Bisexual out. Quit being so damn selfish, pick one and leave some “something something” for others!

Canadians are not selfish and don’t appreciate those that are. No one really does care for the selfish; we’re just real vocal about it.

People who know me love that I don’t care. Those same people know and do appreciate that I’m not averse to beating people with a lamppost if necessary to make people to stop trying to make me care about their cause or rite.

The lamppost? Think “Oz, Wizard Of” and the good Witch warning the Wicked Witch she could get a house dropped on her too. My delivery of the warning is pretty much in the same style and tone of “Glinda The Good”. Now that I think about it, I’m a good person with a big wand.

I have very little if any care for those of the Religious and Political Rite. I don’t care what you identify as politically, sexually or religiously. I don’t care that your rabid sycophantic need requires fed.

I do care that the Rite set want me to come to the light and capitulate or die. This is one of the places where the lamppost comes in to use and either figuratively or literally, I’m good!

The same is true for those of the insistent religious rite insisting we care. These people got the freedom of religion down just fine but don’t know or care about freedom from religion. Even they of the Religious Rite practice not caring. Unfortunately it is not caring that you are being driven bat shit crazy by them.

The freedom to practice your Rite does not give you the right to infringe on my rights.

Canadians do care. Canadians don’t like being made to care and when made to care happens because some cause or politician has lit them up, it aggravates Canadians no end. We have to yap back and we don’t like having to do that either. We’ll do it and we do it real well but we’d rather not because we are a civil civilized people, usually.

I do have cares and causes. If you want to have a conversation with me about what I care about so you can better understand me, I’m generally amenable. My cares and causes are pretty much mainstream, people’s rights and freedoms, the state of the planet and true equality.

Responsible government is very important to me. I’ve written a few pieces on the subject. If you come to read me, those pieces are there if you want them. I’ve also dropped them in to political strings on various social media sites because I do enjoy showing those of the RITE the error of their ways. There is a linked list at the end. If you care to read those pieces great! If not, that’s just fine too.

You learn quickly, or should, what doesn’t work. I think the people screaming for their cause are screaming the wrong thing. I think the “Cause Brigade” should be screaming for people not to care. Don’t care what I am and care about what you are.

Here is a small illustration of making Canadians care. The current Liberal government wanted to fast track Syrian refugees in to Canada to meet a number and date of the Liberals making. The people got up in arms over the fast tracking with damn good reason.

People of all RITES were screaming and fighting. Canadians were made to care.

You’d think those that are supposed to think would know making us care would lead to backlash. A poll was taken and 66% said slow down and get the process right. Don’t go blasting ahead without doing due diligence to meet your time and date stamp. The government actually did listen and slowed down to get it right. In other words, they did their damn job the way the job needed done. We Canadians were able to go back to not caring.

Canadians are also a helpful people with conscience. Try not making us care and see how far you can go and what help you can get. You shouldn’t be surprised cuz that’s how we Canadians are.

Yes Canada has some that are more vocal than most. Yes I would be one of those. Know something else; I’m not wrong on this because I’m never wrong.

Responsible Government

Be Relevant

Medical Assisted Dying

The Big Chair in Ottawa

G.R. Hambley ©
July 27, 2016

It’s My Rite Right!

It’s My Rite Right!

Had this piece on the go for a while and I find myself back to the start for a preamble so to speak after conversations with a couple friends and an elf. The elf would be one of them coffee elves I like and appreciate.

I am a Canadian first, an Ontarian second and a Torontonian third. Yes, we must deal with the order inversely in our daily lives. Our daily lives go on at the municipal, then provincial and finally the federal level.

Me and the elf were talking about faces, specifically faces in our Provincial and Federal politics. We are talking leaders here and the elf nailed it, I don’t like anybody.

I had to think about it when the elf asked me who I did like. One I liked and were our Canadian politics like that of our friends below us in the USA where you are voting for an individual, this person would have got my vote where the Party never could. That person is Ed Broadbent. I liked him a lot.

I’ve liked facets of others and they include Jean Chretien, Bill Davis, Mike Harris, Paul Martin, Jack Layton and yes Stephen Harper. I don’t know enough about Elizabeth May to say one way or another but she seems okay.

There have been a couple I’ve come to despise, Dalton McGuinty and Kathleen Wynne.

There are three for me that invited immediate disdain, distrust and foreboding. They are Bob, “I’m now currently a Liberal” Rae and the misfit boy toys that are Pierre and Justin Trudeau.

I’ve been following and participating in political feeds in social media. Been doing it some since a few weeks prior to Canada’s national election mid October, 2015.

Reasons to Smile

I’ve been keeping an eye to what is going on over the back fence too. Hello family and friends in the US of A! I see the FBI isn’t charging Hillary. With what the FBI said about Hillary’s behaviour, “extremely careless”, doesn’t that just make you all warm and fuzzy on the competence level she displays!

Prior to Canada’s election the stance taking and posturing of all those who were absolutely right that governance their fanatical way was the only way, was indeed something to see. I’m seeing the same behaviour State side. America has a whole different issue and their choices are much more contracted than Canada’s choices were.

This story and my feelings on the matters I’ve observed have been developing in to a narrow focus. Focusing on what I’ve observed about Political Parties and their followers that display as sycophants.

The sycophants never deviating from what they vote. The singular narrow focus of the vapour locked mindset.

Heaven help anyone that disagreed with the divine ones I’ve observed because you were being sent straight to hell for deviant behaviour.

That scared the crap out of me it did! Hey my guardian angel is Lucifer and lemme tell ya, Luci didn’t tell me that hell was filled with all those self righteous sanctimonious sycophants. I’m going to have to have a talk with that Angel of mine and see about getting all those malignant souls moved to purgatory!

Mindset is what we’re talking about here. The mindset of the lifelong devotee to a single political party. Never looking at other points of view and perspectives. They know in the bottom of their little black hearts that their rite is right. No one ever needs anything different because what they believe by their political religion should be believed by everyone.

Those of you with the locked in tunnel vision that declare as “Liberal”, I got a bulletin for you. You are exactly the same thing you rage against in a different skin. There is no difference between you UltraLiberals and the NeoConservatives or the Dippers. You all buy the party line and vilely vomit back the doctrine and gospel according to your Party.

I see zero tolerance and consideration for others and their views. Not terribly Liberal is it? The conclusion I’ve reached is the last thing about a Liberal is their liberality.

You do not get to be Liberal just by declaring yourself one. Those around you decide if you are liberal by how you conduct yourself.

I referred to myself as having my focus narrow. The difference is I’ve been looking at a hell of a lot of behaviours before reaching conclusion.

Some of those UltraLiberals, with commentary I’ve made that criticizes their anointed leader Justin Trudeau have decreed me to be a Conservative. I’m not. I’m a centrist.

Something else the zealot Liberal fails to take in to consideration when their shiny pony is being taken to task is that their shiny pony is the focus because Liberal with majority is the current flavour!

What the ones with tunnel vision don’t get is that Trudeau as the current flavour stick, it is what he and the Liberal party are doing that is to be watched and criticized, condemned or congratulated.

Of course I have my own ideas of what is a good behaviour and what is bad behaviour. That doesn’t matter to anyone of the Kool-aid set.

The rage against and for Stephen Harper. I know there are UltraLiberals who’ve read what I related and said nothing. I’m a writer and an observer. I understand that no comment can indeed be a comment.

National Post Story; Harper preparing to step down as MP.
The former prime minister’s next career move will involve foreign policy.

I’ve said this and I meant it about Stephen Harper.

Harper should have stepped aside 1 year before election. There were indicators and the CPC should have acted. I’ll get to that!

Stephen Harper did himself, his family, his constituents and this country a great disservice by hanging on when he knew he’d had enough.

I think that when Harper got half way through the campaign it hit him that he couldn’t do 4 more years and that is when he went right off the rails.

What no one takes in to account is the leader of a country be it Prime Minister, President, Chancellor, whatever the designation may be, the leader never gets so much as 1 second off. It wears on you. If you have any conscious and conscience, it has to wear on you. You may be calling something a vacation but this is the bottom line; if something serious enough happens, you are getting the call. You damn well know you’ll be getting a call and you wear it as it wears on you.

Stephen Harper, thank you for your service to Canada. Enjoy what comes next in your life.

This is where I get to it and this brings us to the real villains, the parties themselves. It is all backwards and more and more people are noting it and speaking up against it. The vision of the Leader, what a crock! Our elected officials have got this stuff all backwards.

The Leader is supposed to be representing the vision of the party. The elected are supposed to be in tune and representing their constituents who put them in a seat. It isn’t happening that way and there is only one way these fools are going to get it, you take them out of the seat.

The “Leader” and their advisors are running roughshod over the elected member. The elected member who cares nothing about the people that put them in office kowtow to the Leader. Those elected because they’re afraid of being dismissed from the party and facing pressure to flat out resign their seat.

An advisor never has the right to address caucus as if they are the Leader. Currently Butts & Telford who don’t have a seat and can address the Liberal caucus with Trudeau’s blessing. Before UltraLiberals start spouting the vitriol, it was the Liberal Caucus themselves that leaked it to the press.

I believe Canada needs a term of service for the Leaders and Prime Minister. The parties riding the horse in to the ground then vilifying the carcass. How wrong is that behaviour? If the party itself had a spine they’d be keeping the Leader in check and none of them are doing it.

Next up sycophants and others! Those being designated as sycophants for this purpose are the UltraLiberals, NeoConservatives and Naturally Delusional NDPers. Sorry BQ while you have your deeply warped followers, not being a National Party we all know exactly what you’re about and you fall in to the other category. Green Party I do appreciate that you ran in every riding in Canada’s last election and I give you full marks for being so fully engaged!

It’s now 9 months past the Canadian election and the war rages on. The political religious rites of all sides continue to be championed and vilified by their respective sycophants. I’m seeing lemming behaviour in the blaming and justifying as well from all sides.

There are a few months to go before our American friends and neighbours pick a President. The war that is the political rite rages on for them and will go on after their election concludes as well.

I was talking with a woman from New York City who lives here in Toronto the other day about our cities and countries. She was upset over the FBI finding. We talked about it and we both like Bernie. Doesn’t look like that’s going to happen but it just might.

The 7% solution. No single party in Canada has the numbers on their own to get the big chair in Ottawa. It isn’t possible. If you look at the result for the Conservative majority in 2011 and the Liberal majority in 2015 the numbers are the same. No real difference in the numbers for the winner, 39.5% is close enough.

What moved is where the centrists put their votes. Those 7% decide who gets the chair. Simple stuff. The faithful party voters just cancel each other out and don’t mean a whole lot in the grand scheme.

The parties themselves know the number and it is that 7% they are trying to land. You faithful don’t matter. Of course they don’t want to drive anyone away so under usual circumstances the party doesn’t deviate that far from their platform.

We, all of us together cannot afford those who are absolutely sure their Rite is Right. We need thinking competent people who read, watch and listen to multiple sources before making a decision as to what “X” they’re going to mark on the ballot.

It is up to us lowly citizens to keep the politicians in check. That is our job! The job cannot be done properly by people who aren’t paying attention to the world. For all levels, it is our job to put the people in the seats that will carry their constituents voice up the chain and ensure what we say is heard and acted upon.

This is a hard world. There is world war going on and a war on the world taking place at the same time.

We Canadians shouldn’t be taking each other on, it’s not what we do. The politicians love it because if we’re at each other we aren’t watching them.

Liberals tax and spend because it’s what they do. Conservatives tighten the screws because that’s what they do.

We aren’t getting responsible government. We aren’t getting what we are supposed to be getting from the circuses that are the political parties. It’s happening here at home and from what I read, and hear from friends and family, it isn’t happening in the USA either. No responsible government.

Here in Canada we have a precedent. In my travels I pass the heritage commemorative 3 or 4 times a week and lately, it makes me angry when I pass the plaque. We the citizens are not being served as we should be by the politicians we elect at any level. Responsible Government is nonexistent!

You are free to send this to the politician of your choice with my compliments

Responsible Government

We got a real good look at just what Canada is about with the countries refugee revolt. The current flavour sticks had to listen because 66% of the country was saying the same thing. That number of 66% means there are both die hard Liberals and Conservatives thinking and feeling the same thing, DO IT and DO IT RIGHT! If the Liberal date and time stamp wasn’t going to get met, tough! Why? Because getting it right mattered more to Canadians.

Currently the politicians aren’t afraid of us and they should be. I made that observance in a parody shot at the current flavour stick that I did.

I’m not talking about taking the politicos out behind the woodshed and beating them with a big stick. As appealing that may be on some days we just can’t do that. They have to be afraid our vote will go elsewhere and the politicians just aren’t. They see what we do and they know they’ll get their shot. The tax and spend Liberals and the tighten the screws Conservatives. We turn them over fairly regularly and they know their turn will come if they don’t screw up too bad NDP.

Join the light side. The side that scares the crap out of politicians. The thinking, watching and chair deciding side.

Don’t give any political party your undying affiliation and ensure you are personally making a real difference!

I did a piece on Bill C-14 where your right is the Governments duty. On that page there is a link to a page listing every sitting MP. Feel free to tell any or all of them what you think. It is your right.

You know, and I’ve done this before at all 3 levels, marked my ballot so it lets them all know I don’t like any of them!

G.R. Hambley © – all rights reserved
July 07, 2016

Flammables

Flammables

Sir; I implore thee pay heed to that of which I bring you notice
Harkin I say, lend thy ear, give grace with quiescent presence
Overt displays, set them firmly beneath still feet lest they escape
Resultant of behaviours, yours, none with consideration shall tolerate
Talk of the cheapest nature makes cause for concern, draws ire out

Fidgeting mind exposed, given away by the motion of thine eyes
Understanding others doth lend insight to understanding thy self
Such consideration gifted thee; yet still righteous certainty remains
Each and every belligerent, arrogant, ignorant utterance so noted Sir
Due you by invitation, from me with malice aforethought, comeuppance

G.R. Hambley ©
April 17, 2016

Chronological Listing

PC Language, Women Are To Blame!

PC Language, Women Are To Blame!

This began as something I was going to offer a quick comment on. The more I thought about our current communication standards the longer I went.

My narratives are mostly story telling with lessons. The language flows in the form of me just telling the reader a story as if I was telling the tale verbally. I do not concern myself with being politically correct.

So many people, women and men alike are just sick of the politically correct hyperbole. You can count me among those that are not only sick of it but just not doing it anymore. I didn’t worry about the political correctness much in my own discourse any way. I don’t need to.

The language has reached new heights of emotionless. I’m feeling it and quite frankly it pisses me off. Gone too far and because of it people including myself feel pent up and frustrated. They think and feel they cannot express freely because it doesn’t fit the acceptable PC method of communication.

We in Canada have Mr. Feminist in the PM’s chair saying everybody should be a feminist. Just wonderful that is everybody thinking feeling and talking one way. Excuse me while I have as George Carlin put it, “an involuntary protein spill”.

Hell no! Everybody should not be a Feminist! No one should be a Feminist and everybody should be an EQUALIST!

Feminist can have an offensive connotation. Some, male and female alike will see it as marginalizing men and promoting women over men based on gender regardless of merit. This word will drive the Equalists who believe completely in merit appointment batshit crazy and is a sure way to start an argument with the Uber Feminist. There goes your touchy feely don’t ever even give the hint of offense to those looking to be offended language right down the crapper!

I don’t see much PC consideration in the use of that word so it becomes a one way word that isn’t fair to either sex.

The Prime Minister defined himself as a Feminist so don’t be getting all over me for opting to use the term!

I as an “Equalist”, contributed to a storm this Feminist created and you can read what I said about Mr Feminist’s PC “gender neutral cabinet” should you be so inclined.

Women are the reason for this soft indirect language. This language that teaches people to shut off emotion, avoid any contradiction or confrontation while teaching everyone how to be offended.

I started out my adult life in a trade. At the time it was all men in the Union Local I was in. The only woman I ever countered in a trade was an iron worker. She was job foreman too. She had her apprentice who is her brother on the job. The poor bastard. Oh I’m sorry, for the PC folks who are no doubt offended, a bastard is a type of file. Yeah, she’d file him good at times.

The language of the trade was created by the people in that industry. No right or wrong.

This paper was written 10 years ago. See page 4; point 3. “Estimates of the mental health workforce”.

The mental health professions: Workforce supply and demand, issues, and challenges

I had a quick look for more recent data and not finding what I was looking for fast enough, I’ll use my own observations. Nothing stopping you from going and looking for yourself. I wish you would.

I am an accredited Life Coach. My contacts include, psychiatrists, psychologists, psychotherapists, other coaches and those in related health and wellness fields. I look at the fields and the number of women in the industry noticeably outweighs the males when contacts are suggested to me.

Most of my contacts are women. There are a couple women I have chatter back and forth with from time to time. In our communication they have no issue that I’m freer and male speak. We have had some talk on how men and women use different words to describe the same feeling. Yes this would be exploring our feelings and doesn’t come in to the PC Domain.

Much of the language in the industry is driven by women. I’m part of it and I get it. This is especially so with the nature of the industry, you have to be softer and more tactful. It is the nature of the beast and again, no right or wrong.

The biggest culprit for the indirect soft language is H.R., Human Resources. That is a field that is dominated by women. Simple stuff, those in majority in any industry are going to produce the language.

Male dominated or female dominated, how those dominants think is how the descriptive language and the components of the field are going shape and be communicated. No right or wrong.

I’ll offer this up as further evidence of the statement I made that women drive the soft PC language. A piece written in 2012 entitled, “Why Human Resources Isn’t Just For Women Any More”.

I read an item posted on LinkedIn and it led me to writing a response piece using my argument responses, to “Gottman’s Repair Checklist” responses regarding arguing in relationship. When I read the Gottman, it screams written by a woman at me.

Women being the majority in those fields created the language. Again, no wrong and no right. The one’s doing it are going to make the dialect, simple stuff.

The language that those females created made it’s nefarious way in to every day usage and became the standard for interpersonal communication. I understand how that language in personal doings can make people ill at ease.

If the number of people that say they’ve had it with the PC is so large why do we keep using that language? I think that language is used out of fear. We fear when we talk and that upsets us.

Now we are hitting the right and the wrong. If something makes you feel wrong then there is something bad going on. When those bad feelings occur you must explore them and discover why. Might be a damn good idea to stop doing what’s making you feel wrong.

People I’ve worked with appreciate that I’m earthier without being profane. Men and women alike appreciate how I convey. If you want a different description, I talk straight. If you don’t understand, “talk straight”, you have reading to do.

Men and women, while the same species are very different animals. There is no right or wrong in this. We see differently, we think differently and we express differently. We do this because we are different. That is how we are supposed to be or we’d all be the same with a very different means of procreation.

I am an “Equalist” and always have been. I’ve always liked the girls too. What that means is I enjoy the company of women and what they bring as women. I like that we’re different and we can express a mutual feeling with different words. I hope we never all “become one way” with expression.

One of those women I have chatter with, talk to, and yes we talk. I haven’t asked her if she considers what we do, “sharing” and if I did I don’t think she would use that word to describe what we do together. I think and believe this because she has told me she enjoys how I express myself. I like what she says too. Neither of us encumbered by the PC Language.

We both saw something we liked and felt the same about that thing. Her key word was, “Resonate”. My key word was, “Impact”. The feminine and the masculine, together and equal.

Together and equal. Men and women together without having to give up what we are to accommodate a language none of us like.

Together equally, men and women can make this despised correctness and fear that goes with it end. I am so good with that!

FYI …. My “E” IQ is 10 points higher than my “G” or “S” IQ 100 times out of 100.

G.R. Hambley ©
March 29, 2015

Chronological Posting List

Why And Why Not

Why And Why Not

It has been an absolutely shitty year for death in the music industry and it’s just mid March.

The latest, a couple days ago was Keith Emerson of ELP. Yeah sure, you can call them Emerson, Lake and Palmer if you like but not many people I know do.

I’m not going to get in to naming names as I’d surely miss a couple and someone would take great delight in telling me about it. I’m not going to get in to the contributions to the art of those that have passed either.

To all those that went away, they mattered to each and every one of us in our own way. That is enough for us and I believe knowing they touched us is enough for them too.

The icons we grew with that have been such an important part of our lives all the way along the path of life and now in to the backside of our own lives are falling. We miss them and we remember the pieces of ourselves and our lives that they were part of. No, they didn’t for the most part know first personal of each of us but they damn well knew what they meant to us.

Keith Emerson’s passing has a far different feel for us because it was suicide. The range of emotions is greater and rawer within us when death is self inflicted. The things people say are rawer when death is brought on by our own hand.

Some say heartless and hurtful statements. I disagree to a point. The point is there are those who look to be hurtful and thankfully the hurtful ones are few.

So very many that make what others call heartless and hurtful are in reality expressing how they feel suffering their own loss. I can see the statements as thoughtless but not heartless. I can see those hurtful statements as striking back because what you did hurt me.

What I’ve heard and read about Keith Emerson’s physical being, degenerative arthritis where he’d already lost the use of 2 fingers and for certain was going to lose the use of all his fingers. Could he have written? I’m sure he could have written. I’m just as sure no one would be able to play just from the written music the way Emerson heard it.

I and many know about chronic pain and degenerative. I know the pain and anguish. I know how useless I’d feel were I not able to write. I can understand completely being able to do something oh so very well and then not being able to do it anymore. I don’t think I could bear to lose the word my way.

A few comments I’d seen on the suicide said, “Selfish”.

I said this;

His life, like anyone else, to do with as they choose. You don’t get a vote. The emotionalism attached to any pain is 100% real.

A damn tragedy yes. Could it have been prevented? No one will ever know and have to believe because he didn’t reach out, no. No more than the breaking down of his body. I think he’d reached the point where he wasn’t asking himself why and was asking why not.

Why and why not? Many and I am one of them will tell you, when you find yourself asking yourself why take your own life you have a problem. When you stop asking “why” and start asking yourself, “why not” you are in much deeper trouble. I hope if you ever find yourself in that, “why not” place you find it somewhere within yourself to reach out for help.

I use a music service and have a few playlists. One of those playlists I named, “Soulful” and ELP’s “Lucky Man” is the first tune in the list. It is both tragedy and irony that Keith Emerson’s went as he did. The end of life mimicking his own art. A bullet found Keith Emerson well before the bullet from the gun did, “no money could save him, so he laid down and he died”.

G.R. Hambley ©
March 14, 2016

She Said and He Laughed

She Said and He Laughed

This is a variant on my “he said, she said” stories. Someone I know where the relationship transcended the working. The friendly, working relationship became friend.

Yes I do separate church and state. My friends are good about recognizing the lines between helping out a friend and work. My friends also know I like to eat, well.

I don’t mind being a sounding board for friends. If we’re talking more than generalities that means I like you and am willing to open up some. I speak differently with the people I’m friends and friendly with than I do with people I just work with. Most of us do that; speak differently in our work relationships than we do in our interpersonal relationships.

Those communication modes are normal and usual. In our interpersonal relationships we have a different comfort level. That difference in turn makes it easier for us to express without fear of offence or being misunderstood.

I am no different and enjoy the comforts and ease of conversing with friends.

I have been asked if I think before I speak and I truthfully answer, “No”. That is the short answer and it is correct and not in depth enough. I rarely have to put thought in to what I say because I learned how to speak. The ability can be learned and isn’t thoughtless because I am not inconsiderate or rude. In fact what comes out of my mouth is thoughtful and well delivered because I learned how to do that.

Thoughtless speaking, a concept there that might be difficult to grasp as I’ve explained it because most people associate thoughtless speaking with rude behaviour.

Why the preamble about relationship and speech? What you’re about to read is a conversation from one person’s concern and seeking out a knowledgeable, experienced friend to talk to. The exchange is looser and freer than with a client and that is what you’ll see read in this engaged exchange.

Some pretty nice stuff in here and if you have the friend relationship and familial relationship you’ll see here, smile, cuz you’re doing good!

Friend speaks in Italics
My speak in regular case

~.~.~.~.~

Hello Mr Hambley

Ms … how b u

Not good sir
Not good

What is taking place?

Hmmm
Kids

Okay

Please give me an opinion

Is this going to be something I can better answer with thought as in email?

Well if I don’t wind down I’m gonna get a pain
No it’s ok here

Okay and slow down

Son wants a tattoo

Okay
I have one remember?

Not subtle……wow
Yeah but yours is subtle

I mean slow yourself down, you know how

Okay

Simple stuff what I tell everyone;
If you’re going to get one it better mean a lot to you as you’re going to have it for a long time
If you’re going to do it, don’t just pick out of a book

Anarchist!!!!!!
That’s what he wants
An anarchist tattoo
The word

Does he understand what the word means?
Really understand?

Is my kid a terrorist????
What the hell did I do wrong!

Your kid is protesting

No shit Sherlock

You did nothing wrong and in fact have done right

We had such a fight today

Ms this is something we’ve spoken of, it has to be the kids
Tell you what, lemme write this up
I’ll use it as one of my coaching/coping skills pieces
Tell son what I’m doing and to hang on

Ok

Good
Next

I’m upset my friend

I know you are
He’s rebelling … he’s a teenager

I know but he ain’t stupid or so I thought till this morning

It’s what they do. Especially ones with conscience. Now where the hell do you think he got that from?
Good job mom!

Hmmm

You feeling a bit like an oreo cookie?
Creamy stuff between two hard biscuits?
LMAO

LoL

There ya go

I knew you laughed when I told you he wanted a tattoo
I can even see the face

Tattoos are also cultural of the age

Well I gave him my rules
Sterile environment

Of course
And ask around of people who have them where they got the art done

And to do a small one….where if he doesn’t want it anymore it’s not in his face

Let me find something
Wait for this…..

When he had me really worked up

He said…..ok…..he’s gonna do it on his fists
One hand ROCK HARD…..other…..ROCK LONG

Ahhhhhh the heavy metal has him
What you’re looking at in my image is the art I created for a tattoo for myself

And it means

It is Latin and it means, “know thyself”

See I don’t have an issue with that Gary
I ask him to look at this

well duh … it’s on Gary not son …. LMAO
Yes please do have him look. Mine is for the point of my shoulder
I’m not a fan of those arm slogans

I know…..I meant it means something
Now we moved from fist to arm
He is killing me Gary

The lines on text are never fine enough to make it legible for a long time

Next thing he wants a nipple ring

yup … the boy has given over to metal

And his moms early death

You’ll be fine
You do understand, boy, young man, challenging boundaries?
Pushing the “rents” buttons?

I’m trying

Keep that in mind when he talks
He’s going to stretch out Ms … he’s testing himself too
Look, He’s talking to you
This is a good thing

Hmmmm

He doesn’t need your permission for a lot of things anymore and he is still talking to you, put that in the “you done good” category

We’re fighting
Thank you

You are welcome
You are disagreeing not fighting

No I’m not
I’m just trying to relax….

Don’t rant at each other
Refuse to engage, keep your wits
You know that and argument and a fight are different things right?

Yes

Argue in control. You’ll argue better in that state. Hell, ask your sis if I’m right

I’m not a fighter you know

Yeah you are
Prefer to talk

Arguing your point is fighting for your point
The mindset and behaviour are different and it leaves you open to hear what others are saying

Hmmm
Well I’ll calm down and raise it again tomorrow

Good

Thank you

I’ll start writing it today.

It’s good with me I know you’ll do it right

Thank you
FYI …. When I got my tat, it took a lot of control to not go and get another right away. They can be addictive.

Thanks for that upsetting piece of info Mr Hambley

I prefer to see it as arming you for the argument
People say to me, “how can you only have one?”
Nobody has just one
LMAO

Gary
It’s enough now
Please be a lill bitty on my side
Please

I am on your side

Thank you Mr Hambley

You are welcome

I’ll talk to you again
Feeling better though
A little bit

G.R. Hambley February 28, 2016
All rights reserved