transitionu

Life Coaching, Observations, Reflections, Things that make you go hmmmmm

Tag Archives: Encounters

You Don’t Hate Me?!

You Don’t Hate Me?!

No, I don’t hate you. I don’t hate anyone.

The title of this piece, “You Don’t Hate Me” is from an individual who asked me if I like them. That after I had said “No” to being asked by that individual if I liked them. I don’t dislike the individual either.

There are a vast number of people I neither like, or dislike. This possibility didn’t figure in to the individual’s equation.

There are a great many people who don’t put all the factors in to their equations.

All those people I’m in indifferent to, I hope they’re having nice lives and are basically happy. People who are having basically happy lives probably aren’t up to stupid shit. I detest stupid shit.

Stupid Shit 02I got a whole lot of healthy indifference for pretty much everyone on the planet. You and me, we’re all the same. You got a whole lot of indifference too. I’m not much for telling people what they should do but in this case, that worldly indifference, so you should.

I’ve also got an interest in meeting and talking to people and not just foreign ones.

I also have a pretty intense dislike for a handful of people walking this rock too. They earned it.

You hate me! I’m good with that and you know what else, I don’t care. I don’t care and you can just carry that hatred load as long as you desire. Hatred is a wasted emotion. Hating only demeans the self.

G.R. Hambley
July 04, 2017

I shot the Ibis a long time ago and you’re welcome to use the meme.

Chronological Order of Postings

Pride, My Ass

Pride, My Ass

It was “PRIDE” weekend in Toronto the weekend just passed, June 23, 24 and 25. Well it’s “PRIDE” month actually. We don’t want to offend some enough to frost you flake by not being all inclusive now do we!

The tone was different this year. The feel in the revelry and celebration that was there in the past, not this time.

There was a tension in the air brought on by PRIDE allying themselves with BLM and excluding Toronto Police. Toronto EMS and Fire backed their police brethren.

I haven’t read anything about the Toronto Parade as I write this. I don’t need to. I don’t need to read some racist or flaky excuse for blowing up a bridge instead of building one. I don’t need some arrogant flake or racist bigot telling me they are absolutely right and everyone else is absolutely wrong.

I don’t need to read anything for what I’ve got to say here.

The thing about not reading and not listening to anything either, as yet, I’m interested in what may have taken place or not at the “Al Quds” March. Checking my spelling, I see Calgary was peaceful so there’s a nice piece of news.

I already stated the feel within “Toronto The Good” was different this year and it was. I’m not the only one who felt it. Haven’t done much talking to others about that feeling and again, I don’t need to.

There were noticeably fewer people here for this year’s parade. I live in the core, lots of hotels and touristy things to do. There were fewer people. One of the lead Service Elves agrees that there were fewer people this year.

Toronto Pride Horse As I was walking up one of Toronto’s major streets in the core early yesterday evening I heard the clipity clop of horses and sure enough it’s Toronto Police coming up behind me.

All 3 officers were women. All 3 were flying the PRIDE Flag on their saddles.

As the Officers were passing a couple of people, something was said to them. I don’t know what it was that was said as the person that spoke to the Officers had their back to me.

As the Officers and their Chargers headed slowly down an out of the way side street in to the western sun, it occurred to me just how much the asses of the 3 horses reminded me of John Tory, Kathleen Wynne and Justin Trudeau.

Yes, yes I heard just fine what one of the Officers replied when spoken to, “It’s okay, we’ve got our own parade”.

G.R. Hambley ©
June 26, 2017

Foreign Liaisons

Foreign Liaisons

There are times when a chance encounter will forever stay memorable. Of course this is one of those times or I wouldn’t be telling me about it so I can tell you about it.

A woman and her two daughters took the table beside me late one Sunday afternoon. Mom unknowingly knocked my plug lose from the outlet when she sat down on the long bench we share in this cafe.

“Hee Sun” is the woman’s name and she is a creative. Hee Sun and her daughters are South Korean. I learned this in conversation with mom.

Thus begins a tale of enchanting encounter and wonder.

Apology was made for knocking out the plug. Assurances given that there was no need for sorry and no harm was done.

The lady stands and reseats herself after I’ve returned the plug to the outlet. Where the outlets are in this cafe, decorum demands you either put the plug in for someone or get out of the way. Not doing so could lead to an incident which in this case would have been an international incident and who needs those?!

It’s difficult to not see what is up on someone’s computer when you’re settling yourself in to place. Hey if it were something that private you wouldn’t be working on that something in a cafe.

I had some art and poetry I was working on up on my computer and Mom saw it when she sat back down. Hee Sun asked she me about what she saw.

Doesn’t happen often and I’ve done it myself, commented on something I’ve seen that’s art. Made a couple nice friendships that way but I don’t advise trying it unless you’re a creative. A little understanding and perspective folks. Understanding that there are personable people and that being personable is a good thing is a nice start.

I could have shut off any conversation right quick just be putting my ear buds in. Not like I haven’t done it before and won’t do it again. Sometimes when I got the buds in they’re just in so I don’t have to listen to anything and by anything I also mean anyone.

We start to talk and Hee Sun tells me she has written a children’s book and the illustrations are done by the daughter who is at home in South Korea.

GRH - Hee Book 02.Slice of sliceJPGThe two daughters (I do not know their names) were graduating McGill and Mom had come from South Korea for the girls commencement. They had a few days here in Toronto; then a couple days in Montreal for the exercise and back to Toronto for a few more days.

Choosing Toronto over Montreal to tour, good choice. Toronto is the most cosmopolitan city in the world. Landing here in “Community Mine”, lucky for me and lucky for Mom.

We can have the Toronto vs Montreal debate another time.

So me and she talked. We shared our thoughts about poetry and art. We talked a bit about her two graduating girls. We talked about how we’re all the same.

Sun Hee and me talked for about an hour as the girls amused themselves with their phones. The girls will be staying here and looking for jobs. We talked about that too.

Oh alas, oh woe is me. They’re grown up and they’re staying here and they’ll be so far away from their dear mother. If you’re thinking the lament of this South Korean Mother is the same as a Canadian mother or an American Mother or Jewish Mother, you’d be correct. You’d be correct because we’re all the same.

It wasn’t that extreme but Hee Sun was feeling the separation anxiety.

She read a couple of my poems and a narrative of mine. We went through them together as Hee Sun read aloud. She apologized for English once as she went to one of her daughters for help with better understanding the English through Korean.

Hee Sun showed me the cover of her book on her phone. She said she had one copy at the hotel and would send it to me. You see the book she sent me in the first image.

I mentioned her 3rd daughter did the illustrations for the book and they are terrific. Strangely or maybe not, the mom in the book looks similar to Hee Sun. Maybe it’s just because they have the same hair-do. Nah, it’s deeper than that.

GRH - Hee Book 01.SliceJPGI introduced the lady to John Donne and like so many, she knew Donne without knowing it’s John Donne. I told Hee Sun that I have a good friend who after reading Mr. Donne’s Ye Olde English, decided that any future spelling errors would be attributed to Ye Olde English. The lady smiled at that.

Hee Sun spent a semester at Harvard and did a trail visiting the places of poets renowned in England. She likes the Romance poets and now has another romance poet she likes, me.

I had this conversation a couple weeks ago (June 04, 2017) and I’ve run the encounter past some of those in this “Community Mine” that I’m friends with. The thing about those people in my community and I point it out to them as we talk, they’re the same as me and Sun Hee and another friend of mine who is a mom and lives in South Africa.

We are all the same. We all want the same things.
A decent place to live.
Enough to eat.
Some work.
Some leisure.

That’s it folks. All she wrote. Simple stuff. We all want the same because we are all the same.

“Good Friend” saw this piece pretty close to the completion point. It was asked by Good Friend, “What about love?”. I don’t know if we all want love and I’ll take that up elsewhere.

I didn’t set out on this enchanting encounter of mine to tug at heart strings. What we two were talking about, how could it not? It could only not tug the heart at least a little if we aren’t the same.

Hee Sun provided me with her address and she will be receiving a letter from me. There is so much wonderful in a real letter, a hand written letter. Tactile and tangible and on occasion, scented.

Our conversation was worldly and I loved every minute of it. I’m going to tell her so by hand.

I went and had a look at where Hee Sun lives in Korea, Gimpo and it is pronounced, “Kimpo”. If you’re aged enough and were a fan of MASH, you’ve heard that name before.

The first return in the search brought me a bit from a wiki, Gimpo, directly across the Han river is North Korea.

I can’t even fathom living that. Sure I understand the political just fine but I can’t even grasp living with that situation in my backyard.

I will ask Hee Sun in the letter I write her to try and tell me how she feels about living with that threat as she does and I hope she’ll reply. I will be relating and asking other things as well.

Hee Sun told me she plays the guitar and sings. I’m thinking if I ask nicely, perhaps she’ll tell me a musical story.

G.R. Hambley ©
June 19, 2017

 

 

Save

Save

Save

Going Clean – Lyric

Going Clean

Lyric

Whispers in the air
Eyebrows raising up
Pretending not to hear
Taking in what’s said
Sure it stings but…
If you play the show
If you let them know
It’s not what they think they’ve seen
It’s their ending and you’re never gonna be clean

Waiting out on the stairs
You pass and laughter erupts
Won’t let them see you tear
Hair hiding the ears gone red
Sure it hurts but…
If you play the game
If you let them blame
It’s not what they think they’ve seen
It’s their ending and you’re never gonna be clean

Watching for an angry flair
Voices telling you you disgust
Head up smiling ear to ear
None of those voices a friend
Sure it’s hate but…
If you jump on in
If you give up the win
You know what they think they’ve seen
You know in their ending you’re never gonna be clean…

You know what happens if you go mean
You know being like them makes you… unclean

G.R. Hambley ©
May 21, 2017

 

Community; Mine

Community; Mine

Souls old, souls new, souls lost, some hoping desperately to be found
Philosophers, perambulators and pals, the odd sniff of pretention
Hims and hers, some that are, quite honestly, deeply confused
Every face, should you care, bringing a unique study in story

Retro and metro, and for others, the splendour that is sartorial
Eye on a passing thigh and my oh my is that Rebel Circus I spy
Open minds, open hearts, open conversations and well who knew
Faces from faraway places, happily in a space that has no races

Accountants, Aides to Teaching, but if you can’t say without preaching
Cups of coffee, gallons of conversation and Sugar when it’s Psunday*
Quips and quills, more than a few spills, splotches of great delusion
Untold stories, stories shared, stories that will be woven by me

Aged, ageless, those just beginning to write their journey for the ages
In they tromp, costumed and not, cute as buttons, kids enjoying theatre
New ones in 21st century jolly jumpers, jump dad jump, gee thanks mom
Thespians, orators, of both the professional and amateur ranks rant

As life goes on all around you, yours for the sharing, it’s no illusion
Names and faces, you come to know, as you do enjoyment grows
Contacts, connections, conversations in confidence, all do ensue
Elves wearing bells bearing versions of coffee, catch me one if you can

G.R. Hambley ©
May 09, 2017

Toggle It

Toggle It!

I was outside one of my coffee spots. Yes I know, so far not a surprise or funny.

A store a couple of doors down is being remodelled. Two Sprinkler guys are on that site. Now so you know, Sprinkler Guys are Plumbers Lite.

So you’re aware of the degree of mental acuity, plumbers only know 3 things. Breaks are at 10 & 2, payday is on Thursday and Shhhh…. runs downhill. So how much can sprinkler guys know is a valid question except it aint question.

One sprinkler guy is trying to get a short length of 1″ ID pipe out of the van. There is flooring in the van and the pipe is stored under the flooring in different sizes. The flooring has compartments that are long enough to hold full lengths of pipe.

He’s tries one length of threaded rod to fish the pipe out. No Luck. Think trying to pull cotton or a pill out of a bottle with one finger and it keeps getting away. A friction fit. Next, the guy goes the same route but with three lengths of threaded rod. He eventually gets the about 2′ piece of pipe out of the van.

Guy puts a couple things away and says to me as he’s heading to the store, “How we doing”. Now he could see I was amused with his little adventure.

I said to him, “I’d of done that differently”.

He says, “What, drive backwards real fast then hit the brakes!

And I said, “I would of put a toggle bolt on the end of the threaded rod”.

Guy thinks about it for a couple seconds and says, “That’s a good idea”.

My way might not have worked but it sure beats mucking up the threads on the rod(s).

This also illustrates a point I like to make, when you encounter someone, you never know what they have in their repertoire. That person you encounter might just be a smart ass. Or just maybe that person is a smart ass who knows stuff.

I had said nothing to the Sprinkler Guy. Wasn’t pointing and laughing either. When you ask someone a question, if you don’t like the answer given that is your problem and not the problem of the person responding. I cover that in “The Rules of Life”.

We also see the Sprinkler Guy’s character in this. When it didn’t go like he thought it was gonna go, he was gracious and thoughtful. Those are a couple qualities I really like.

I didn’t enlighten him that I am a Tin Smith, Commercial / Industrial Air System primarily. I don’t do it anymore and you know what, I haven’t gotten forgetful or stupid.

A toggle bolt, also known as a butterfly anchor, is a fastener for hanging things on hollow walls such as drywall. Toggle bolts have wings that open inside a hollow wall, bracing against it to hold the fastener securely.

G.R.Hambley
April 13, 2017

Haunting Her – Lyric

Haunting Her

Lyric

Unseen she stepped inside
Know it’s her by the steps
She stares straight ahead
Her face kept firmly set

Padding past the tables
Moving straight on through
Glassy eyes somewhere far
Waiting her turn in Queue

Hear her talking at the till
Voice that completely engulfs
She’s lets out a little laugh
Sees me talking to myself

          What’s got you lady blue
          Where are you so far away
          Won’t you sit for just a few

Coming back round again
Know she’s seeing everything
Always a table just for you
On her own with what’s disturbing

See her reflection in the glass
Does she know what they took
Lady blue where’s your spark
Had to see my wondering look

Leaving quietly like she came
There’s no smiles or waves
If I could tell you what I see
Only lonely as she leaves

          What’s got you lady blue
          Where are you so far away
          Couldn’t you of sit for just a few

G.R. Hambley ©
April 04, 2017

Everyone’s Girl – Lyric

Everyone’s Girl

Lyric

Her days don’t begin before three
Her nights spent in party grove
Never seen the sun go down
Seen it coming up so damn often
More times than you’d care to know

She’s the one they all want,
          She’s the one they wanna take home
                    She’s the one they’ll kiss and cry for
She’s everyone’s girl

See her prowling in neon blue
Shining like a sapphire mine
Turning all those gawking heads
Growling at the whistling wolves
Giving them the tail swish kiss

She’s the one they all want,
          She’s the one they wanna take home
                    She’s the one they’ll kiss and lie for
She’s everyone’s girl

She loves those night lights
She owns the city streets
Girl just loves to cruise
Done up to the nines
Loaded and easy on the eyes

          She’s the one they all want,
                   She’s the one they wanna take home
                             She’s the one they’ll kiss and die for
She’s everyone’s girl
Everyone’s girl, my drive

G.R. Hambley ©
February 16,2017

 

December 21st 2016 Musings

December 21st 2016 Musings

Here it is Christmas again. Been a crap year according to most and I agree with the most.

Today we here in the northern hemisphere do have the 2nd best day of the year because after today the days start getting longer again! Won’t be long before we’ll be Patio Lanterning again! This is part of my coping skill set as an S.A.D., I know what it is, I know it will pass, ohmmmm.

You can see how happy and festive I am now that the days will be getting longer!

grh-a-2016-ho-007

I’m tired of the anger and animosity that has carried over from 2015’s election on Canada’s political front. “We The People” are pretty damn tired of the anger and animosity in their piece of the world as well. We The People will be carrying theirs on for the foreseeable future. Personally I expect it to end somewhere just around the corner from never. History people, history.

The loses in Music kept coming and coming and coming. A statement I made 2 or 3 weeks back is this; as a child of the back end of the 60’s the losses this year have been more difficult for those of us from that era. I also said it isn’t a competition. This is the life experience we have that 20 somethings don’t and companies want those 20 somethings to have.

The most painful and devastating loss for me was Keith Emerson and this is what I wrote in response to the anger and animosity of Emerson’s suicide.

I have things to be thankful and happy for too.

A couple surprises in my favourite coffee spot were quite nice. Dave Thomas came in one day. Yes folks Doug McKenzie himself came in. For my American friends, if you don’t know Dave Thomas, he played “Russell the Pharmacist” on “Grace Under Fire” as well. I looked at him to make sure what I was looking at was correct. He saw me look and watched. I smiled and nodded (like your work), he smiled back and nodded (thank you). This is what you call your average Canadian Celebrity encounter.

The 2nd one was a grand experience. An artist I’ve liked for a long time came in to the coffee spot, Liona Boyd. She became part of the conversation. Ms Boyd told something to me off of me telling her where I had seen her perform one time. She made it fun and personal and I really hope Gordon Lightfoot liked the song that was done for him. I gotta see that video! I was so enamored, as beautiful and elegant as ever Liona Boyd is!

I related the Boyd story to, “Good Friend”. I told her I don’t care if some people consider it sexist, “Liona Boyd, She’s a doll”. Good Friend agreed that it’s a compliment and from what I said, a perfect description. Hell, I’ll admit this too as I write, I’m still enamoured!

I’m going to leave this here with happy thoughts and happy memories.

To all of you whether it’s Christmas or the Seasonal change or just plain weekend, I wish you all the best in the next year and the years after that.

G.R. Hambley – December 21, 2016
All rights reserved

Remembrance Day 2016

Remembrance Day 2016

Remembering what those that went before us gave so that we enjoy the freedom we do. Remembering that fighting for freedom is still necessary.

I have family that was in service including one I never met.

The one of my family I never met was my paternal Grandfather. That man was killed in WW II. A dispatch rider hit by a truck at night under black out conditions. It was one of our trucks.

in-remembrance-clipart-1

A father and uncle who were in the Canadian Navy. A great uncle who was in WW II. Another uncle who was an Air cadet and went on to Canadian Army Reserve. My Father joined the Canadian Army Reserve too. I have a cousin by marriage that was a United States Marine. The cousin that man married, born in Canada, served in the U.S. National Guard.

My own service was Air Cadets Canada.

You would expect that with all the centuries of warring the world wouldn’t be as tough a place as it is. Sadly and stupidly, this not the case. We don’t have to remember because we are reminded on a daily basis that oppression and war are still integral to the operation of this planet.

There is more talk of making November 11th a holiday in Canada. It’s a shame it is easier to get people to stop for a whole day than it is to get them to stop for 2 minutes at the 11th hour.

Remembrance Day 2015
Remembrance Day 2014

G.R. Hambley – November 10, 2016
All rights reserved

Save

Save

Save