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Life Coaching, Observations, Reflections, Things that make you go hmmmmm

Tag Archives: Relationship

Carlin Influence? More than I knew!

Doesn’t matter what the endeavour is, we all have influences that are part of our developed style. This presumes you have a style and if you don’t, maybe someday, if you work at it, often, you’ll have a style too.

There are two parts to language and they are “Cognitive Academic” and “Basic Interpersonal”. If you prefer, the two parts are what you write and what you talk.

As directed in the “Teach English as a Foreign Language (TEFL)” course, I was reading a paper where I hit a line and a bit from “Carlin on Language” immediately appeared vociferously at full volume in my brain.

This is how it went when I told “Good Friend” about the incident.

They hurt my head. I was reading and then OW! Fortunately for me, George Carlin went off in my brain and then it was okay.

Front-loading EL
Purpose Ensure access to content instruction taught in English by “preteaching” for upcoming language demands

Content Determined by language purposes. Teaches sentence structures and vocabulary needed to engage in content skills or concepts

Preteach. no such thing! It’s teaching. Carlin, “Preboarding”, it’s not “Preboarding” and is “Boarding”. Mutter mutter mutter!

I swear some of this shit jargon is designed to make you go, “What the hell is this bullshit”.

I’m a big fan of George Carlin and have been for a long, long time. That I vehemently disagree with his take on Golf Courses and Voting,

Carlin Meme 004

it doesn’t change that the man was brilliant and I love his stuff. I even got to see him perform once, yeah, it was great and I smiggle just thinking about it. “Smiggle” is my own word and It is derived from a combined smirk and giggle.

I had Carlin’s AM FM Album when I was a teenager. It was when I was a mid twenties adult that I saw George.

I’m not completely on board with what Carlin blames as the creator of PC Language. I have some clearly defined ideas of my own on whom to blame for the PC Language. I do agree with the Madison Avenue reference George uses.

Influence without realization to a degree. The two types of language, blending the “Cognitive Academic” with the “Basic interpersonal” in his delivery. It hit me as I was doing course work just how much more brilliant Carlin was then I ever realized.

Carlin Meme 002

Carlin blended those two aspects of the language so well where I only do it well. I checked in with “Good Friend” on this matter of blending the academic information with interpersonal delivery. “Good Friend” said yes, I do that blending well.

Our mediums are different but not. Do you not think Carlin wrote everything down and worked out the pieces before delivering them to an audience? Of course he did, simple stuff.

I do the same as I write to be read by you good people. Could I do a stand-up thing, yeah I could but it would be something I developed that isn’t comedy as such and I will not be a Carlin clone. There was only one, he’s it!

Blending language and I have a couple papers to write. I have leeway on topic. Just perhaps I should give the powers that be insight in to that blending of the “Cognitive Academic” and the “Basic Interpersonal” when there is a Construction Oops.

The topic, I hear there’s a crane in Toronto they can’t get down. I know exactly how the language in that conversation is going to go!

Down to it for me but we’ll let George have the last word.

Carlin Meme 003

G.R. Hambley ©
October 03, 2017

 

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If Only – Lyric

If Only

Lyric

Walking on home alone,
that old bell softly chimes
Passing right on by,
the tower bell strikes again
Falling farther behind
that niggling bell tolls once more

now it’s gone to three
world’s turning quietly
alone in the night
and it’s mostly alright
if only you were here…
if only you were here with me…

Feels like I’m missing
more than a few chimes of my own
Wondering why I even said
this place isn’t striking me as home
Really starting to understand
It’s me for whom that bell is tolling

Everything tangling me up
get so damned lost sometimes
Mind turning it end over round
keep expecting that lost key to show
Walking around thinking way too much
hoping this magic hasn’t got lost

now it’s half past three
world’s turning quietly
alone in the night
and it’s not alright
if only, if only you were here…
if only, if only…
if only you were here with me…

If only I could just walk over
leave this lost feeling behind
If only I could just touch your smile
let you see love isn’t lost
If only I could so tenderly say
only my mind was lost

now it’s long, long past three
world’s brightening quickly
alone in the light
and it’s gonna get right
it wasn’t freedom chiming
the lightning did strike
now it’s time to pay the toll

if only…
if only…
if only you’ll believe
believe when I say I’m sorry

G.R. Hambley ©
August 01, 2017

If I Can Do It

If I Can Do It

If I can do it, you can do it!

The truth is, no, you can’t do what I do. Before you hurt yourself, or someone else, stop it!

I was asked about how I felt about the statement, “If I can do it, you can do it”. The asker’s context had to do with the statement as applied to someone with an addiction.

We aren’t talking trivialities here. This is not about the annoyance of someone who can and someone who can’t put a dish in the dishwasher.

The question was given to me with the following;
Not only was the tone condescending, the phrase itself seems to  imply “no matter how difficult your struggle may be, mine was even more so, yet I overcame it. So you really have no excuse.”

Lets move to the application of that phrase that we have no problem accepting, advertising.  Silly people think running that phrase out is a motivator and will boost sales.

My response included not only my disdain for that “Then you can” statement and the attackers who run it out as well as my disgust with the, “Give it your 110%” crowd. You aint got 110% so stop trying to give what you aint got! It’s making you nuts, stop it!

On any given day your 100% is different. Some days you’ll accomplish more. Some days you’ll accomplish less. Most days, you’ll accomplish about the same. At the end of the day if you can honestly say you gave it your 100%, you’re doing just fine. If you’re being told your 100% isn’t good enough, exploring why isn’t a bad thing to do.

Back to the main feature, “If I can do it, you can do it”.

That statement/action hits a few of my trigger points bang on. The passive/aggressive and the emotionally controlling brought to you by your local know nothing at all.

The term we’re talking about here is “Attack Therapy”. I do not believe in that approach because I believe attacking someone is going to result in failure. Then of course there is the fact the person being attacked isn’t at their best. You just don’t know what your attacking is going to do to an already problem psyche!

If “Attack Therapy” is something you believe you need, punch this in to your search engine, “Landmark Forum Attack Therapy”. I went to one of Landmark’s information sessions; couldn’t believe the audacity of one of Landmark’s individuals getting up in my face and not wanting to back down.

My masthead way up there says, “Certified Professional Coach”. The guy at Landmark Forum who was  up in my face, he wasn’t. No matter how much he wanted to believe or have me think he is a coach, he wasn’t and never will be; at least not a good one. He hasn’t got the sensitivity required and being trained in “Attack Therapy”, he never will because he is about beating you down in to submission and building you up in the Landmark Image.

I wasn’t in the least pleased with this individuals acting out. You could also call the display, “Displaying”. Look that up in your guide to the animal kingdom. We’re animals too folks.

I  made a bold statement myself, “no, you can’t do it”. My statement will cause some to be angry with me and others to think I’m full of it. Fair enough. I get it. I understand the mindset.

I’m asking that you process this a little different. I’m talking about an encounter that angered me. I was angry and didn’t flat out blast the perpetrator. I needed to find out just how full of shit this guy was and plan my counterattack. We can call it “Compose my rebuttal” if you prefer.

Getting someone backed down or brought down without creating a scene, quickly, one of my skills. Throwing your hands in the air, turning your back and walking away does not constitute deescalating the situation and making your point. It is important to make your point so the other person knows just how much you appreciated their action(s)!

“You did it so I can do it” you say? Maybe you can. Maybe you got in your personal makeup what I and some others got in our personal makeup. Having that makeup doesn’t give you the right to embarrass, humiliate or attempt to control someone. Fact is, if you really got the parts, you wouldn’t of laid that trip round the psyche on your victim.

Well “La Dee Da” is what a few have given to me in response to me talking about things I don’t do.

The defence mechanism of belief that says I am being condescending and seeing the person I’m speaking with as inferior to me. The belief that I’ve just told them, “If I can do it, you can do it”.

That belief position doesn’t stay with the individual for long because I won’t have it! They are enlightened directly. I don’t use, “You’ve offended me snowflake tactics” to enlighten those people either. Doing so would be an emotionally controlling tactic and that’s just wrong.

For those encounters to have happened at all means these people have been subjected to the “If I can do it, you can do it”, emotional control people have tried to exert on them.

There are far better ways than attacking to stimulate, motivate and support people.

A few days ago I got talking with an individual and the problem is addiction and the person came right out and said it in their telling me of their upset.

I just let the person go. When there was a falter after the initial rush, I said one word to the person, “Headspace”. The person shrugged and exhaled and very softly said, “yeah”.

I just waited and then I did something else that I can do and you can’t. I told the individual that they, “Absolutely Should” do something. I’m also very big on not telling people what they should do. The “If I can do it, you can do it” statement is also telling someone what they should do.

When I let loose the, “You absolutely should”, it was as affirmation and support. The individual was lamenting about not speaking up and letting their feelings be known.

I saw the person a couple days later. In a better frame of mind and with a thank you for me.

I tried a couple times informally working with people who have addiction and eventually I had to cut all ties. It had to be done and it wasn’t pleasant.

I don’t deal with addiction. I do not have the skill set to work with people with addiction. Just because someone else can do it doesn’t mean I can.

I aint got the parts and I know it. Those parts include wanting to and I don’t.

If you could see my contacts at a certain site, you would see a number of people with the word “Psycho” in their job title. These are the people you wanna talk to. Along with the physicality and emotionality of addiction there is the brain chemistry to be considered. These are the people that got a skill set you may need.

Those people can do it with addiction, I can’t and never will. This is called knowing and understanding your limitations.

G.R. Hambley ©
July 08, 2017
All rights reserved

 

Foreign Liaisons

Foreign Liaisons

There are times when a chance encounter will forever stay memorable. Of course this is one of those times or I wouldn’t be telling me about it so I can tell you about it.

A woman and her two daughters took the table beside me late one Sunday afternoon. Mom unknowingly knocked my plug lose from the outlet when she sat down on the long bench we share in this cafe.

“Hee Sun” is the woman’s name and she is a creative. Hee Sun and her daughters are South Korean. I learned this in conversation with mom.

Thus begins a tale of enchanting encounter and wonder.

Apology was made for knocking out the plug. Assurances given that there was no need for sorry and no harm was done.

The lady stands and reseats herself after I’ve returned the plug to the outlet. Where the outlets are in this cafe, decorum demands you either put the plug in for someone or get out of the way. Not doing so could lead to an incident which in this case would have been an international incident and who needs those?!

It’s difficult to not see what is up on someone’s computer when you’re settling yourself in to place. Hey if it were something that private you wouldn’t be working on that something in a cafe.

I had some art and poetry I was working on up on my computer and Mom saw it when she sat back down. Hee Sun asked she me about what she saw.

Doesn’t happen often and I’ve done it myself, commented on something I’ve seen that’s art. Made a couple nice friendships that way but I don’t advise trying it unless you’re a creative. A little understanding and perspective folks. Understanding that there are personable people and that being personable is a good thing is a nice start.

I could have shut off any conversation right quick just be putting my ear buds in. Not like I haven’t done it before and won’t do it again. Sometimes when I got the buds in they’re just in so I don’t have to listen to anything and by anything I also mean anyone.

We start to talk and Hee Sun tells me she has written a children’s book and the illustrations are done by the daughter who is at home in South Korea.

GRH - Hee Book 02.Slice of sliceJPGThe two daughters (I do not know their names) were graduating McGill and Mom had come from South Korea for the girls commencement. They had a few days here in Toronto; then a couple days in Montreal for the exercise and back to Toronto for a few more days.

Choosing Toronto over Montreal to tour, good choice. Toronto is the most cosmopolitan city in the world. Landing here in “Community Mine”, lucky for me and lucky for Mom.

We can have the Toronto vs Montreal debate another time.

So me and she talked. We shared our thoughts about poetry and art. We talked a bit about her two graduating girls. We talked about how we’re all the same.

Sun Hee and me talked for about an hour as the girls amused themselves with their phones. The girls will be staying here and looking for jobs. We talked about that too.

Oh alas, oh woe is me. They’re grown up and they’re staying here and they’ll be so far away from their dear mother. If you’re thinking the lament of this South Korean Mother is the same as a Canadian mother or an American Mother or Jewish Mother, you’d be correct. You’d be correct because we’re all the same.

It wasn’t that extreme but Hee Sun was feeling the separation anxiety.

She read a couple of my poems and a narrative of mine. We went through them together as Hee Sun read aloud. She apologized for English once as she went to one of her daughters for help with better understanding the English through Korean.

Hee Sun showed me the cover of her book on her phone. She said she had one copy at the hotel and would send it to me. You see the book she sent me in the first image.

I mentioned her 3rd daughter did the illustrations for the book and they are terrific. Strangely or maybe not, the mom in the book looks similar to Hee Sun. Maybe it’s just because they have the same hair-do. Nah, it’s deeper than that.

GRH - Hee Book 01.SliceJPGI introduced the lady to John Donne and like so many, she knew Donne without knowing it’s John Donne. I told Hee Sun that I have a good friend who after reading Mr. Donne’s Ye Olde English, decided that any future spelling errors would be attributed to Ye Olde English. The lady smiled at that.

Hee Sun spent a semester at Harvard and did a trail visiting the places of poets renowned in England. She likes the Romance poets and now has another romance poet she likes, me.

I had this conversation a couple weeks ago (June 04, 2017) and I’ve run the encounter past some of those in this “Community Mine” that I’m friends with. The thing about those people in my community and I point it out to them as we talk, they’re the same as me and Sun Hee and another friend of mine who is a mom and lives in South Africa.

We are all the same. We all want the same things.
A decent place to live.
Enough to eat.
Some work.
Some leisure.

That’s it folks. All she wrote. Simple stuff. We all want the same because we are all the same.

“Good Friend” saw this piece pretty close to the completion point. It was asked by Good Friend, “What about love?”. I don’t know if we all want love and I’ll take that up elsewhere.

I didn’t set out on this enchanting encounter of mine to tug at heart strings. What we two were talking about, how could it not? It could only not tug the heart at least a little if we aren’t the same.

Hee Sun provided me with her address and she will be receiving a letter from me. There is so much wonderful in a real letter, a hand written letter. Tactile and tangible and on occasion, scented.

Our conversation was worldly and I loved every minute of it. I’m going to tell her so by hand.

I went and had a look at where Hee Sun lives in Korea, Gimpo and it is pronounced, “Kimpo”. If you’re aged enough and were a fan of MASH, you’ve heard that name before.

The first return in the search brought me a bit from a wiki, Gimpo, directly across the Han river is North Korea.

I can’t even fathom living that. Sure I understand the political just fine but I can’t even grasp living with that situation in my backyard.

I will ask Hee Sun in the letter I write her to try and tell me how she feels about living with that threat as she does and I hope she’ll reply. I will be relating and asking other things as well.

Hee Sun told me she plays the guitar and sings. I’m thinking if I ask nicely, perhaps she’ll tell me a musical story.

G.R. Hambley ©
June 19, 2017

 

 

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Going Clean – Lyric

Going Clean

Lyric

Whispers in the air
Eyebrows raising up
Pretending not to hear
Taking in what’s said
Sure it stings but…
If you play the show
If you let them know
It’s not what they think they’ve seen
It’s their ending and you’re never gonna be clean

Waiting out on the stairs
You pass and laughter erupts
Won’t let them see you tear
Hair hiding the ears gone red
Sure it hurts but…
If you play the game
If you let them blame
It’s not what they think they’ve seen
It’s their ending and you’re never gonna be clean

Watching for an angry flair
Voices telling you you disgust
Head up smiling ear to ear
None of those voices a friend
Sure it’s hate but…
If you jump on in
If you give up the win
You know what they think they’ve seen
You know in their ending you’re never gonna be clean…

You know what happens if you go mean
You know being like them makes you… unclean

G.R. Hambley ©
May 21, 2017

 

Supporting the Causes

Supporting the Causes

Yesterday was April 30th, the end of “Testicular Cancer Awareness Month”.

Also yesterday, I was asked to put an 8 Ball emoji on my FB page for “Prostrate Cancer Awareness”.

I told the individual that asked I wasn’t saying no but I’d have something to say on the subject.

I don’t like to override myself. I like to give my postings 3 or 4 days before putting up something new. Exceptions to the rule and rule carefully those exceptions. I got a personal beaut too.

Causes, we all have them and most people are of the mind that their cause is the cause everyone should get behind. If you aren’t on board with them then you’re some kind of something they can stick a label on.

In my travels through April I saw no mention of what April represented on the cancer frontline. I’m talking about usual moving around in the core of my city. No special deals with a percentage going to research for testicular cancer. I got my face in a knot over this lack of male consideration in a piece I wrote about opting out on pink in October.

I was enlightened by a member of my community that one of those major entities I note in the no pink for me has changed the way they do things. This would also be a lesson in being at the least personable, and even better outgoing within your community. You do meet some terrific people.

I don’t know how far reaching the cancer campaign for, “Lady Balls” was. For the uninitiated, Lady Balls are ovaries. That was the crux of the campaign, ladies got balls. Appealing to those feminists sans vagina and FemiNazis everywhere no doubt. Pissing off more than a few along the way with the approach too.

Someone close to me went to Ovarian cancer. I know what it’s about. I can even use the real words that represent the condition. I also happen to believe you shouldn’t be cute when it comes to health matters. That doesn’t mean you should be brutal either.

We in the 1st world are pushed at electronically on a daily basis. Push technology assaulting us when we the people want pull technology. No one likes being pushed.

Showing what cause(s) you’re behind is a good thing. Showing and telling people in your own space where they can learn more about or support the cause, also a good thing. Quietly asking someone for a hand for your cause as was the case with my being asked to post the 8 Ball, another good thing.

In the moment I have my own causes to consider and the things I need to do to be done.

Sorry man, the emoji is out, hope this will suffice.

8 Ball 01

G.R. Hambley May 1st, 2017

Once Again, No More Yesterdays

Once Again, No More Yesterdays

I’ve been saying we need a damn good protest movement once again. I’ve been thinking we need that movement longer than I’ve been saying we need it.

Something else I’ve maintained for at least a decade is that Orwell missed it by 50 years. I’m more convinced today than I was 10 years ago or 20 years ago that he missed by 50 and we are closing in on 2034 real fast.

If you are of a RITE you are best served by moving along back to the barn because there is nothing here for you.

I’ve had a lot to say and haven’t said much. I’m not alone. Been keeping eyes and ears on the raving fanatics and sycophants of various RITE; mostly those of the raving political RITE. Politics is their religion and you shall hear their RITE words and you shall embrace them or you shall be branded with being that of which they rage against. That goes for all of them as they are all the same.

Me? How do I get to this heart and belief space? I’m a Teller. I’ve stated that my writing is based on observation, feeling and experience. Sometimes, those writings are of my own observed felt experience. If you prefer, you can think of me as a raconteur. I’m a Watcher and a Teller. I’ve always had a curious nature and I am an accredited Life Coach. I’m a Watcher, a Questioner and a Teller.

Those who know me, they know how so very much music means to me. Music is playing far, far more than television. Television serves the great purpose of being able to go see what I’ve read.

In my telling I’ve noted that with those of the RITE, there are some animals more equal than others. Anyone think maybe Bob Dylan saw it, knew it and said it almost 40 years ago? Then again what would an Oscar winner know; isn’t that right you of the RITE that are still reading.

The last 2 lyrics I wrote are protest, “Once Again” and “No More Yesterdays”. I do not like what is taking place in the world. I don’t like what is being done by those who are more equal than others, (Globalization Liberals) anymore than I like the bullying being done by any special interest groups.

When I was looking at the page with 2 lines to go on “No More Yesterdays”, (not the last 2 lines of verse in the piece) Bob Dylan’s, “Slow Train Coming” came up in my music shuffle. Now I’ll admit you gotta make sure you’re actually hearing what Bob is speaking at times.  After decades of practice, my Bob speak is pretty damn good.

After all these years, I heard “Slow Train” differently. I’m convinced Slow Train is a protest song and not a gospel song. In the last verse Dylan wrote, and I checked, “Turning my loved ones in to puppets”. Before yesterday I never bothered to go look and just figured what sounds like, “PUPPIES” was just Bob speak for puppets. Re-evaluating, I thought it was just possible Dylan had written “PUPPIES” all those years ago. In the context of the song it makes perfect sense.

So maybe Dylan wrote one thing and sang something else that would give acknowledgement to and correlation with someone else’s work. A work that he’d read and appreciates. I’m talking about something that was required reading for many of us, George Orwell’s, “Animal Farm”. In Animal Farm, the puppies are turned in to the security force to serve those animals who are “more equal than others”. I’m not seeing a whole hell of a lot of difference between puppets and puppies in this scenario.

In the same song Dylan writes, “Deciding America’s future from Amsterdam and to Paris”. Anyone for the centralization of power with foreseeing what the EU was going to be perhaps?

Not a single person I’ve talked to wants some like design of the EU here in Canada or in the United States.

BREXIT, rejecting centralization of power. TRUMP winning POTUS, partially due to the push for globalization. Canada, Trudeau pushing for the centralization of power within the party and taking backlash from within the party for it.

None of us want to be told what we must do with our Countries by those who are not of our country!

None of us want taxation without representation under globalization.

Those Globalists looking to centralize power and create a proletariat aren’t telling you something very important. For there to be a true global village some things have to change and Dylan said that too, “Counting the cost”.

I see it as some things will have to die to achieve that Global Village utopia. Yes I have definitive ideas on what must die.

What are you prepared to let die, kill or defend to achieve the vision of someone that will take away from you and assign you rights in Orwellian fashion?

Those not of a RITE; we do outnumber those trying to batten people down and take away everyone’s choice and voice. We must grow louder and more insistent.

A generation is 20 years. Dylan’s Academy Award Winning Song, close enough to a generation after “Slow Train” and it makes me think and it makes me wonder. I think and wonder if in those two songs a generation apart, Bob was saying, “I showed you and I told you what I was seeing and now I’m done telling you because truly, Things Have Changed”.

Have a good look around and take a listen, just For What It’s Worth. You may find not a whole lot has changed for the better and in some cases not at all in fifty plus years.

One thing is certain, the battle lines have been drawn!

First two lines of the last verse in my, “No More Yesterdays” piece, a small tribute and thank you to Bob Dylan.
There’s a new train leaving the station
Going to be a change in world relation

G.R. Hambley ©
January 20, 2017
All rights reserved by me and others

Symptomology – Sonnet

Symptomology

Sonnet

Honest mindful opinion colliding, colluding with emotionality
One approaches cautiously from a position rational to the mind
Whilst almost aware of the fret stepping above, the heart setting time
Deliciously intoxicating with a bitter twist, sober agonizing
Once upon a day of wayward thoughts, epiphany in therapy
In arguments, arrows; in agreements, nods; in passion, blind
Life in love, the carriage ride of the ridiculous and sublime
Once all bars have been annotated, pathways to harmonizing
Voice of insistent pleasing, swearing one and one make one
Each night restless, heart lays heavy beneath clammy flesh
The waking on the morrow, serenade of mourning doves
Having essence fill all the senses, which from you shall not run
Eye promise, the light that binds, two lives, two souls, enmesh
Ecstasy truly is that one and one are one in their divine love

G.R. Hambley ©
December 01, 2016

Not Caring Is Endearingly Canadian

Not Caring Is Endearingly Canadian

Why do you care? Why is it important to you that I must care about your cause or what you believe?

The worst thing you can do to a Canadian is make them care. We love not having to care. Cause Groups would be much better off asking people not to care.

You would be better served if I don’t care. It’s when you make me care that I have to say and or do something. You’d be better served asking me to continue to not care. I can usually do that quite nicely.

Why is it important to you that I care who you have sex with? Why is it important to you whom I have sex with? If you aren’t doing it with me, a child, or someone that you’ve tied up and are keeping as a pet against their will, knock yourself out. I don’t care!

In truth I do have a small issue with those of the Bisexual persuasion. There aren’t enough of the Asexual to cancel the Bisexual out. Quit being so damn selfish, pick one and leave some “something something” for others!

Canadians are not selfish and don’t appreciate those that are. No one really does care for the selfish; we’re just real vocal about it.

People who know me love that I don’t care. Those same people know and do appreciate that I’m not averse to beating people with a lamppost if necessary to make people to stop trying to make me care about their cause or rite.

The lamppost? Think “Oz, Wizard Of” and the good Witch warning the Wicked Witch she could get a house dropped on her too. My delivery of the warning is pretty much in the same style and tone of “Glinda The Good”. Now that I think about it, I’m a good person with a big wand.

I have very little if any care for those of the Religious and Political Rite. I don’t care what you identify as politically, sexually or religiously. I don’t care that your rabid sycophantic need requires fed.

I do care that the Rite set want me to come to the light and capitulate or die. This is one of the places where the lamppost comes in to use and either figuratively or literally, I’m good!

The same is true for those of the insistent religious rite insisting we care. These people got the freedom of religion down just fine but don’t know or care about freedom from religion. Even they of the Religious Rite practice not caring. Unfortunately it is not caring that you are being driven bat shit crazy by them.

The freedom to practice your Rite does not give you the right to infringe on my rights.

Canadians do care. Canadians don’t like being made to care and when made to care happens because some cause or politician has lit them up, it aggravates Canadians no end. We have to yap back and we don’t like having to do that either. We’ll do it and we do it real well but we’d rather not because we are a civil civilized people, usually.

I do have cares and causes. If you want to have a conversation with me about what I care about so you can better understand me, I’m generally amenable. My cares and causes are pretty much mainstream, people’s rights and freedoms, the state of the planet and true equality.

Responsible government is very important to me. I’ve written a few pieces on the subject. If you come to read me, those pieces are there if you want them. I’ve also dropped them in to political strings on various social media sites because I do enjoy showing those of the RITE the error of their ways. There is a linked list at the end. If you care to read those pieces great! If not, that’s just fine too.

You learn quickly, or should, what doesn’t work. I think the people screaming for their cause are screaming the wrong thing. I think the “Cause Brigade” should be screaming for people not to care. Don’t care what I am and care about what you are.

Here is a small illustration of making Canadians care. The current Liberal government wanted to fast track Syrian refugees in to Canada to meet a number and date of the Liberals making. The people got up in arms over the fast tracking with damn good reason.

People of all RITES were screaming and fighting. Canadians were made to care.

You’d think those that are supposed to think would know making us care would lead to backlash. A poll was taken and 66% said slow down and get the process right. Don’t go blasting ahead without doing due diligence to meet your time and date stamp. The government actually did listen and slowed down to get it right. In other words, they did their damn job the way the job needed done. We Canadians were able to go back to not caring.

Canadians are also a helpful people with conscience. Try not making us care and see how far you can go and what help you can get. You shouldn’t be surprised cuz that’s how we Canadians are.

Yes Canada has some that are more vocal than most. Yes I would be one of those. Know something else; I’m not wrong on this because I’m never wrong.

Responsible Government

Be Relevant

Medical Assisted Dying

The Big Chair in Ottawa

G.R. Hambley ©
July 27, 2016

A Lady’s Dignity

A Lady’s Dignity

I’ve been meaning to write this up for a long while. This is a how to on getting in to the back seat of a car on a busy street when accompanied by a woman who’s wearing a short skirt or dress.

Let’s be real clear about me; I aint no gentleman. Never have been and never will be a gentleman. I am considerate and understanding. I have definitive ideas about how to look out for a woman I’m with and I said so in, “Escorting A Lady Through A Door”.

Guys if it’s your first date, you’re going to score big points with the lady you’re with by doing this. Hell, even if she aint wearing a short thing do this and you’ll still score big points with the girl!

I have just been outside one of my coffee spots. I’ve seen this take place so many times where the guy didn’t know how to do it and the woman wasn’t pleased. The woman wasn’t pleased to have been sliding across the back seat. It’s a journey for the woman of making sure there is no discovery of Treasure Island.

The tell tale duality that is the look of disgust and discomfort that only a woman can convey.

Guys, we too can do that look; just not anywhere near as good as the ladies! A thing of true amusement as long as that look isn’t directed at you. Unfortunately for the lady in the current event, the guy was sky gazing and didn’t see the look she was giving. From the look on the woman’s face, she knew the right way to go about this adventure and the guy was going to hear about it.

I can’t even feel for sorry my fellow man in this case. Well I did have a tiny bit of empathy for him as I was thinking, “you poor bastard, you’re gonna be hearing about this”! That was probably more of an autonomic guy response than real empathy cuz I was smiggling* at the time. Smiggling, someone has to make up words and I’m good at it!

The Uber had pulled up and our not such a hero opens the back door. He points for the woman to get in. She looks at him for a second and then does so. The lady has to turn sideways so her back is to the other door and then slide along the seat while trying to keep her dress from riding up and giving the driver a nice rear view mirror peep show. Our hero gets in, closes the door and off they go.

This is the correct way on a busy street where you can’t walk around to the other side of the car after seating the lady and closing her door.

When the car pulls up you get in first. Go about mid way across the seat so you can reach the door to close it after the woman gets in. If there is dust and dirt on the seat, it’s now on you and not on her pretty dress or skirt.

When the lady seats herself you lean across her and close the door.

There are a few benefits from doing it this way you may not have considered. If you put the arm not closing the door up on the back of the seat around the woman for balance, you can just leave your arm there after closing the door. You could put that free hand on the ladies thigh for balance and if you’re closer in acquaintance, give that thigh a little squeeze. Let her know you like! If nothing else you’ve presented your cheek for a kiss for being so gallant!

You’ve also protected the lady’s dignity and I happen to think that deserves a kiss!

If the lady hasn’t recognized what you have done for her, In the interest of equality you good Sir are now free to tell her about it!

And what did I see of our heroine in this little adventure I’ve related? If I told you what I saw, just what kind of a protector would I be? The answer is always nothing. I saw nothing but her face.

Try this if you need a smile in the moment.

G.R. Hambley ©
July 02, 2016

*Smiggle is my own word – combined smirk and giggle
*Smiggling – combined smirking and giggling